Portal Breach: The Collision of Worlds :: v.4.0


    Advice from the Robotic Uncle

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    Re: Advice from the Robotic Uncle

    Post by Scaramouch on Mon Sep 04, 2017 1:24 pm

    "You two have made for a nice 'family' so far! It's all I could ever ask for, really."

    Did... Did she really mean it? Like, actually mean it?

    Though it was strange for a robot and a cat-woman to act as surrogates, what they were wasn't important. Korra wanted them. She actually wanted them, and that was all Scaramouch needed to hear. Before she could even react, a metal hand grasped the Avatar's head and - whump! - shoved it into the android's metal bosom. "Aw, that is sooooo cute~!" he squeaked. "You really like hangin' out with us? Really, really~?" Oh no, Scaramouch was getting hot! Cooling fans loudly droned, but it was pointless - the damage had been done! His grin couldn't possibly get any bigger. "We like havin' you and Bailey too, kiddo! Come over for breakfast! Come over for lunch! Hell, come over for second breakfast, elevenses, luncheon, afternoon tea, dinner, and supper!" It was too late, Avatar. You had made a friend for life. That was an awfully long time, you know? Here's hoping you had the patience of a saint - you'll need it.

    All the while as Korra reminisced and shared personal details of her life on another world, the android faithfully listened. He listened, kept mum, and absentmindedly stroked the Avatar's head in a friendly, caring manner. Only when she was finished did Scaramouch pipe up in his Scaramouch way. "It's not easy bein' a hero figure," he agreed with a small nod, "but think of it this way, kiddo: you did what very few could." What did this mean, exactly? Let him elaborate!

    With a curt laugh, the android gently released Korra from his iron-clad grip. "You wanna know why heroes are in such short supply?" he asked. The answer was simple, if not... a little sad. "It's 'cause bein' a hero is a thankless gig, that's why! Everyone puts their expectations and concerns on ya - everyone - and there ain't no manual that comes with the job. Through you, kiddo, people are able to wake up each mornin' and find a reason to keep on tickin'. That's why you had a target on your back - all symbols of hope do. And for what it's worth, this old 'bot thinks you're very brave for choosin' the higher, less journeyed path." When it came to heroism, Scaramouch was sorely... lacking in that department. Not because he was callous or apathetic, but because he was afraid. A robot's place was to obey, to serve. And while a hero may do both, they were oftentimes prone to stepping out of conventional boundaries and doing what no one else could or wanted. In that, the android truly was in awe of Korra's selflessness.

    "Of course, there ain't no harm in freein' yourself and livin' life, too~!" Another downside of the heroic life: being society's lapdog. That was no life for a young dame, no sir! "So long as you're cognizant and not thick between your ears, I think ya should go out and forge a trail for yourself, kiddo! Find what ya like to do, see what you wanna, and just enjoy life for what it is - a series of random, spontaneous events~! Better yet, share it with somebody." Wink wink, nudge nudge. He gave the Avatar a knowing wink and accompanying smile. "Life's no fun when you're too busy fightin' baddies and worried about reputation. Now that you're here, I highly recommend ya just appreciate each day for what it is, kiss your puppo and Bailey, and live every moment to its fullest. Hon, it works for me~!"

    Why do you think Scaramouch loved faffing so much?

    But yes, living on your own wasn't without its expenses: money, space, food. All this and more would impede the girls' progress, though grasping success wasn't impossible. It simply took careful planning, budgeting, and discipline! "Hmm... well, you will definitely need enough room for Naga," Scaramouch hummed. With a polar-bear dog as big as she, Korra's options would unfortunately be limited. "I dunno 'bout a flat such as mine, but you cooooould find a house to rent? That's a thing, y'know!" A house with a spacious yard, preferably. As for jobs... that was easier said than done.

    He clicked his tongue, thinking. "Savin' on groceries is smart, but so is figurin' out what you wanna do." The android had a funny feeling, just a small one, that saving the world and bending the elements didn't pay well. He also had a feeling that Korra wasn't a veteran of money... "When it comes to employment, ya should really narrow down your passions and interests. Don't do what most people do, kiddo! If ya find somethin' your heart's not into, you'll be miserable and bored. Since this world has a different concept of cash, I suggest you and Bailey figure out your likes together. Personally, I don't see you as the customer service-type. You're far too free-spirited and stubborn for that~!" And, really, it'd be a crying shame to confine someone like Korra, who could bend the elements, to a cash register.

    "French kissing?"

    ...Oh, gear shift!

    "Mmmmmhm~!" Scaramouch's face said it all: ooh la la~! "French kissin' is when you add a lil' tongue. Hon~! Some folks like that." And because he was such a pill, the android stuck out his and loudly went - "Phhhhbbbbt! And ya don't need to have a penis for penetrative sex! That's what strap-ons are for." ...Oops! He said the p-word. Eh, Korra was old enough.

    "What? Y-you mean...fingers can go there?! Hnnngh...!"

    Or, well... maybe not. Mentally, that is. She seemed quite aghast by the very idea.

    In true shameless fashion (as was typical of Scaramouch), he shrugged. "Er... yes? Fingers can go anywhere, kiddo. It is an erogenous zone, after all." Like, duh...?
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    Re: Advice from the Robotic Uncle

    Post by Korra on Tue Sep 05, 2017 6:15 pm

    What was--whoop! And suddenly the Avatar found her face pressed up against the simple cotton of Scaramouch's lazy day t-shirt. A hand lay comfortably atop her scalp and the metal beneath her face seemed to warm up immediately. Combine that with the pleased croons of the robot and it seemed she had said just the right thing! Chuckling softly against him, she nevertheless returned the affection by wrapping her arms around him and shuffling closer. Aah...see? This was more affection than she had ever been afforded by her real uncle. Quite comfy too. She could see what Lunette saw in him. Lips tugging into a playful smirk, Korra peered up at him with her crystal blue eyes. "Really, really! You two are amazing" She chirped back, voice filled with mirth. How else could Korra describe two people who had been so helpful and supportive of the two of them? "Those are a lot of meals, you sure we won't eat you out of house and home?" Despite the position against him, she did her best to puff her chest out proudly. "Being the Avatar gives ya a mighty appetite." Could you afford to foot the grocery bill, Uncle Mochi?

    As Scaramouch began to stroke her head, large fingers very careful with her hair, Korra found herself leaning into his hand. On some level, she felt that such affection should be 'strange' coming from somebody she hadn't known for a while. But then again, this was somebody she'd given a familial nickname to! He had been very calm, and being held like this kinda reminded her of her dad. The young woman almost protested when he let go, though she complied by pulling away from his chest. And yet, she still shifted herself so that they were knee to knee as she listened. Thankless gig... Yeah, no, the jazzbot had it pegged. The bottle was turned about in her hand, beverage swishing softly as Korra smiled to herself. Symbol of hope...she liked the sound of that. "You're right. After all, the other Avatars had their troubles too! It's not easy but...there's not really any other choice, you know? At least, not one I could live with." The Avatar smiled brightly at her 'uncle', eyes brimming with a fair bit of naivety. Despite what she had been through, the drive to protect and fight had not yet been beaten out of her. "Thank you. It means a lot to know that you think I'm brave! For what it's worth, Bailey and I think the world of you both." She echoed his own phrasing, leaning over to give him a nudge. "You're generous, kind people. I think Bailey's been missing out on folks like that in her life. So knowing the two of you are here for her... I'm happy."

    Living her own life, Korra was embarrassed to admit that that had not been something granted to her back home. How could she, after all? She had been trained from a young age to solve the problems of the world. A pleased smile graced her lips at the robot's words, only turning bashful at the mention of 'sharing' her life. Real subtle. "I would like that..." Korra seemed to mumble, cheeks a-glow. That was the life for her, no doubt about it! Just enjoying each day and loving those she cared for. A faffer's life for her, it would be!

    Though even a faffer had to consider reality, and the truth was that with two dogs between them? Space was a priority. Snapping out of her daydreams, the young woman nodded her head as eagerly as a bobble head. "Oh yeah, no. We definitely need a yard for Naga and Ailbe, they have to stretch their legs!" Scaramouch was definitely speaking her language, a happy sound escaping her at the thought of a house to rent. "A real house? We could rent one?!" It was clear that buying a home was new to her, especially a little house. "Oh that'd be perfect!" Even narrowed down their choices for homes! What a productive little visit this was proving to be.

    "Yeah...that's easier said than done." Korra admitted with a drooping pout, fingers idly playing with the strands of her ponytail. The idea of a job seemed as evasive as the stars in the sky. If only she could reach far enough to pluck one out! What were the opportunities for employment here? What could she possibly do? "Like the people in the groceries stores and stuff?" Without even meaning to, the Avatar's lips curled at the very thought. Seated behind a register or wandering the aisles... She could already tell she'd just feel cooped up. "Yeah, I think I'd be lucky to make that work a week before getting fired..." With a 'hmph', her chin nestled into an open palm to ponder over her 'interests' and 'passions'. Hmm... "Well, I like to help people. Obviously. And I really like getting to exercise, train, working out... I do my best when I can move around and use my muscles! If I'm just sitting behind a desk or something, I get restless." With furrowed brows, she gave the robot an almost hesitant stare. "Maybe I could help people workout at the stadium...?" The halt in her tone betrayed her own doubt in such an idea. There was no guarantee that anyone would be interested, after all.

    "Oh! Tongue?" Giggling at the impromptu raspberry, the young Water Tribe woman seemed to appreciate the subject change. Her own tongue waggled within her own mouth, Korra pressing it against the back of her teeth experimentally. The tip roamed over the gum line, and for a moment she imagined doing it in Bailey's mouth. Humming thoughtfully, she nodded to herself. "I think I can do that." Strap-ons, though? That was another story entirely. Granted, the term was technically foreign but considering the subject at hand and what the words implied... Heat flushed its way across her face and the Avatar could do little else but huff. It was her surrender, for obviously, Scaramouch had her there. Just as he did with this new knowledge that fingers could go anywhere. Soon, her gawking drifted from the robot's perplexed face down to her own palms. Each finger flexed, Korra gaping at them as if she expected them to detach from her hand and crawl away like little brown caterpillars.

    "I can't believe it... Nobody ever told me that!" For now, the idea was...inconcievable. Then again, everything below Bailey's waist might as well be a mystery wrapped in a puzzle. "I think for now...I'll focus on the stuff that's not down South." Korra muttered, seeming embarrassed as her hands dropped back down into her lap. "I don't think I'm ready for that yet."
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    Re: Advice from the Robotic Uncle

    Post by Scaramouch on Sat Sep 09, 2017 7:05 am

    Oops.

    Was this too touchy-feely? Maybe it was too touchy-feely...

    Pfft, nah! Not when the Avatar herself was just as affectionate! "Eat me outta house and home, huh~?" You know what? Scaramouch will accept that challenge. "Tch! It's like you've never been to a buffet or somethin'... They're practically designed with mighty appetites in mind, kiddo~!" Had the Avatar been to a buffet? ...Did she even know what a buffet is? All sorts of mechanical gizmos and doodads clicked as they processed this highly important query. "Mmmmmaybe we'll take you and Bailey out to lunch one day so you can have the experience, how's that?" the android offered. Hey, it seemed like a really 'uncle' thing to do! And, you know, Scaramouch was somewhat curious to see why organics loved buffets so much. Something about endless piles of nourishment...?

    "Thank you. It means a lot to know that you think I'm brave! For what it's worth, Bailey and I think the world of you both. You're generous, kind people. I think Bailey's been missing out on folks like that in her life. So knowing the two of you are here for her... I'm happy."

    Urge to suffocate Korra in yet another hug... rising! As hard as it was keeping both hands to himself, the robot managed to respect the Avatar's personal space. She was just so cute and innocent and - gah! Bailey was one lucky dame. "Hon~! Aw, thank ya, kiddo... That's very kind of ya to say! In truth, I think a lot of us have been missin' out on healthy, stable relationships - platonic, romantic, and anythin' in-between. A new world means new hardships, and what better way to overcome our collective struggles than to partake in communal well-bein', huh?" Made sense to him! Of course, Scaramouch was also a hopeless romantic (and quite naive), but the android stubbornly clung to his infectious optimism. "And hey, don't sweat it, kiddo," he continued with a cheerful smile. "We're here for both of ya, just how you're both here for Lunette and myself. We may not be related and we certainly hail from all walks of life, but!" This next part was important. The android held up a finger and drove his point home. "But, so long as we nurture our relations and stick together, I think we're all gonna be juuuust ducky. Hon, hon~! Can't enjoy a garden if it's nothin' but weeds and neglect!" Life's easiest when it was simple and carefree, you know?

    "Of course ya can rent a house, kiddo! It's, like, what a lot of couples and folks do~!" Ooh, was that blush spreading across the Avatar's tanned cheeks? Inconspicuous scanners made short work discerning Korra's vitals. Rising body temperature... quickened heart rate... sweaty palms... Mhm! Those were the telltale signs of love, alright~! Fortunately for Korra (and because Scaramouch was feeling generous), the robot didn't poke fun. That'll come later, trust him. "Pfft, the stadium..." Oh alright, it was gonna come now.

    Synthesized honking filled the air. "As if, kiddo!" remarked the android, incredulous. Silly Korra; gotta step out of your comfort zone and see the world! Can't do that while shackled to an arena, hm? He winked and not-so-politely poked the Avatar's cheek. "Why settle for somethin' you've already known when there's an entire world at your fingertips? Why, with skills like yours, kiddo, I bet you could get all sorts of stuff!" But, yes - it was time to brainstorm. From the sounds of it, Korra enjoyed being a help to the people and wasn't a fan of being locked up like a bird in a cage. Who could blame her? A stadium was just a cage without a visible frame, however, and Scaramouch felt she could do better. Loads better, in fact. "Y'know, if I didn't know any better, it kinda seems like you wanna be a personal trainer," he pointed out. Nothing wrong with that, but there was still plenty to consider before they got too ahead of themselves.

    A pensive - "Hm..." - escaped him.

    Now, Scaramouch wouldn't pretend to know the full details of being a personal trainer. He would, however, engage in a quick internet search and study whatever he'd find lightning-fast. There were some good things and ther were some bad things. "Well..." he muttered, clicking his tongue. "Good news is, kiddo: I think you're young and spry enough to help motivate others to get in shape. Bad news: you might need certification. It's just, like, how the system works, y'know? Otherwise, any ol' schmuck could be one!" Knowingly, the android didn't let Korra flounder.

    "You'd probably have to take courses and get schoolin', but I don't think it'd be anythin' major. You could easily do it!" Scaramouch grinned. "That is, of course, assumin' you wanna be a personal trainer. If ya decide to look into it, you'd at least be able to work at plenty of locations and you'd get to help all sorts of age groups. I think the job sounds very diverse and liberatin' for your needs!" And, if not, he could always perform another internet search and pick the web for whatever bounty it so freely provided. You know who else could benefit from an internet search, though? And on her own time?

    "I can't believe it... Nobody ever told me that!"

    Yeah.

    Truly, it was a sorry, sorry state of affairs... One that even had Scaramouch shaking his head in disbelief. "On the level?" he asked, piping up. "Were you, like, raised in a monastery or somethin'? 'Cause, uh, no offense to you or nothin', but man..." For someone her age, Korra was awfully ignorant in a lot of ways! Then again, maybe Avatars were supposed to be celibate? Oh lord, what a can of worms that would be. The robot quickly fanned a metal hand and steered their conversation to greener, more productive pastures. "Alright, alright - so ya don't wanna entertain any of this stuff with Bailey for now. That's fine! Hey, your body, your rules, ya dig? But I wouldn't be a very good uncle figure if I said ya both don't need to brush up on your sexual education. It's, um, kinda important..." Birds and the bees from a robot... What a timeless classic. Where was Lunette when he needed her!?
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    Re: Advice from the Robotic Uncle

    Post by Korra on Wed Sep 20, 2017 9:52 pm

    A buffet? The Avatar peered up at the robot, her eyes gleaming like a pair of aquamarines. "Oh, I know what a buffet is!" Shocker, right? "That's like the Inn's restaurant! Different kinds of food, all laid out for people to sample as they want, right?" Definitely sounded like something befitting a large appetite. So many options to choose from! Even if she was used to the Inn's buffet style food, however, it didn't lessen the excitement that brightened up her smile. "I'd be honored, Uncle Mochi!" Her smile soon turned mischevious, nudging Scaramouch with an elbow. "Hehe, maybe we could think of it like a double date!" A double date with people she thought of as family who were treating herself and her girlfriend to lunch, but a double date nonetheless! Despite the teasing, it was clear that Korra enjoyed the idea, practically buzzing with excitement.

    "Kind as it is, I speak nothing but the truth!" She boasted with a toothy grin. It wasn't in her nature to lie about things like this! So if she thought the world of this goofy robot, it was as sincere as it gets! As for the lack of stable relationships in their lives, good ole Uncle Mochi spoke nothing but the truth. There were exceptions of course, like Sokka! But on the whole, there had been something missing from the lives of the Water Tribe teenagers. Things were tough when you lost your family and friends. Finishing off her bottle with a thoughtful hum, Korra was quick to toss in her two yuans as soon as she swallowed! "I think you have a point! Taking part in that talent show was a lot of fun. It made me sad I'd missed the one the year before!" Interacting with the community, hearing the 'ooh's and 'aah's of people admiring her talents... It felt pretty spectacular.

    "Maybe it's just because I'm in love and stuff but... I've been feeling really happy lately. Like a new Korra!" One with new friends, a new girlfriend, and new plans for the future! How could that not make somebody excited? Dark cheeks reddened at Scaramouch's reassurance, a deep crimson that traveled all the way up to the tips of her ears. "T-thanks... It feels really nice to have people like you guys to depend on." The garden metaphor was a little weird, but it made her smile all the same. Sounded like something Tenzin would say, although he wouldn't have sounded nearly as chipper as the robot! Chuckling lightly, she regarded the other fondly. "You may be silly, but you really are wise." Just like a real uncle.

    Renting a house... Who knew there was so much to being in a relationship? Well, apparently everybody but Korra knew something like that. It was almost embarrassing, but she couldn't even think about that as her heart felt as though it might pound right out of her chest! A house, a yard to let their pets run around in, a couch to snuggle on, and a bed to sleep in together... All of it made for a dorky lovestruck look on the Avatar's face. Yep, she had it bad. Only obnoxious honking and a poke to the cheek could cut through a rosy and romantic vision like that! Inspecting her fingertips, Korra felt a frown tugging at her lips. "I don't know..." It all just sounded so far away. Even as she spitballed a potential career, the young woman began to seem more and more hesitant of her own idea. As Scaramouch said, there were pros and cons to it. On paper, it sounded like something up her alley and it wasn't like Korra would let something like certification get in the way or something she wanted! But that was the problem, wasn't it? She sighed, and her cheek found a comfortable place nestled upon her own palm.

    "All I've ever wanted to be was the Avatar. Ever since I was a little kid! It's everything I've worked for...and I guess now I realize that no matter what, I am the Avatar. And I don't have to prove anything to anyone or do things for people just because I think that's what an Avatar does. But I don't think I really want to be a personal trainer... It sounds fun but I think I'd enjoy it more if I was just training with Bailey or a friend! And you can't really charge for that..." What kind of jerk would charge their friends or their girlfriend for something like that? Obviously, she had to reassess her wants...the kind of things she wanted in a job. Fingers wove their way through the hair of her scalp, lips pursing into a pout. "I don't suppose you can make a job out of just...'helping people', huh?" Seemingly simple, right? It was all she wished, and yet it seemed so elusive! What kind of job would truly allow you to help people? Too bad vigilantism didn't pay.

    "On the level? Were you, like, raised in a monastery or somethin'? 'Cause, uh, no offense to you or nothin', but man..."

    Hm? Blinking at her uncle figure, Korra could only give a surprised "Um, sort of?" Poor uncle Mochi. That would probably need a bit of elaboration. Pulling her hand free of dark brown tresses, attention shifted completely to the metal man. "When I was 4, the White Lotus realized I was the Avatar. They're sort of like body-guards. They trained me and protected me for years in a private compound in the Southern Water Tribe. Stuff like kissing and relationships and...sex," She whispered the last part as if trying to conceal the subject from invisible ears. "Wasn't really an important curriculum for a growing Avatar. The most I learned was about the time of the month, and how babies are made!" Neither of which were going to be of particular use while she was courting a certain redhead. But Scaramouch had a point, these were things she'd have to address someday. Who knew what else she was ignorant about?! Furrowing her brows, the Avatar cupped her own chin in the deepest thought she could conjure up. "Would the library be a good place to learn about it? I mean, I love you and all Uncle Mochi, but I'm not sure you could handle being the only one teaching me about this stuff..." Poor guy might blow a gasket over just how little she knew! Or maybe Korra would be the one to bend, fainting as the robot gave her more and more pointers for the 'bubs'.

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