Portal Breach: The Collision of Worlds :: v.4.0


    Between A Branch and A Hard Place

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    Lunette
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    Between A Branch and A Hard Place

    Post by Lunette on Sun Apr 09, 2017 4:16 am

    APRIL 9th | Year 7 | 10:34



    With spring bursting its way through the cold, it was always a pleasure to be outside to feel the sun's warmth. Though there was still a bit of a chill in the air and a light coat was required, Lunette wore an airy sundress to balance herself out. Besides, with all that fur, her legs would be warm enough. In her right arm was a basket made of wicker, and on her left shoulder was a small bag--commonly seen on campers--that held a few tools for whatever she may find. Basic stuff, really; a lighter, a pocket knife, a flashlight, and a few other simple useful items. Today would revolve around wandering the forest a bit for anything that was fresh and in bloom. A greenhouse worked well for more sensitive fruits, vegetables and herbs that couldn't stand a cold snap, but one could only fit so much variety inside. Boots kicked away some rocks from her path as Lunette slid down a small trench, landing in a root-infested area. The trees didn't have much in the way of flowers or fruits here, though, and the feline's eyes quickly took note before moving onwards.

    She wasn't looking for anything in particular, though she had a small list in the basket with some details scribbled next to it. Oranges, mangoes and apricots were the firsts on the list, followed by radishes, carrots and other wildly growing vegetables that hid under warm places, such as the roots of trees or in the gross, swampier parts of the forest. Good thing she had thick rain boots on for just such ocassions--the thought of one her beloved heeled-boots getting stuck in muck made her cringe! Luckily, for now, her wandering wouldn't lead her to such a place. Instead, through a small path made of thorns and brush, a gentle, tasty scent greeted her as she approached. "Hm?" her nose wiggled curiously as a smile appeared across her soft muzzle, "ooh! That smells like..." Her thought was paused as she carefully crawled through the small opening, tail following along the ground so as not to tangle in the thorns. Upon emerging, there was a clearing in an oddly perfect circle, and in the center...

    "Cherries~!"
    A beautiful, single cherry tree, pink as Lunette's nails, stood there quietly as sun beams broke through the surrounding, taller and more intimidating trees, almost giving the area a mystical appearance. Purring at the scent of cherries, Lunette approached cautiously and placed her paw on the trunk of the tree. It was so pretty... pink petals falling gently, the strong, sweet scent of cherries... the area itself made her feel almost nostalgic in a way, and for a moment, she sat below the tree to take it all in. "Hmm... cherry pie, cherry chardonnay... cherry sauce..." her purring grew a little louder at all the things she thought to make with fresh cherries, mind aflutter with images of ingredients and cooking methods. "I wonder if a cherry beer would taste good..." If there was apple cider, surely cherries could be used to make something similar, hm?

    Her hand grasped at the piece of paper in the basket as she looked it over, tilting her head to the side. "Well, they're not apricots, but they'll do fine!" She figured today, the focus would be on collecting the cherries--and radishes that grew nearby. They were rather plump, too, full of nutrients and tasted much better than the ones she grew herself. Perhaps it was the wild soil that helped them become monstrously delicious compared to their wimpy counterparts that slumbered in the dirt of the greenhouse. Scratching off 'radish' from the list, Lunette looked up at the tree, eyes shifting quickly from branch to branch in thought before she stuck her hand out and grasped the trunk firmly. Nails dug into the tree (not enough to break it, though) and she started to climb--rather quickly, actually--all the way to the top.

    Despite the apparent lack of sunshine the tree received, the cherries looked very good--a deep, passionate red, dew dripping from them as the feline plucked one from a stem and inspected it thoroughly. "No bruises or holes... firm..." her nose wiggled once more as she sniffed the fruit, "very pungent." Taking a kerchief from her inside her dress (yes, between the furry bosom), the cherry was gently cleaned of any debris and Lunette gave it a curious nibble. "Mm!!" The acidity and sweetness of the cherry seemed perfect; she couldn't resist eating the whole thing and spitting out the pit before swallowing it whole. Purring and licking her lips, Lunette continued to pick a few of the cherries, trying not to bother the tree in any way (accidentally breaking off a branch, or disturbing nests in the tree) and eating a few before they could manage to get into the basket.

    16:20


    The wicker basket had been nearly filled once Lunette realized it was getting later in the day. There wasn't much sunlight left breaking through the trees, and though her eyesight at night was grand, the thought of being in the woods in the dark made her feel... not safe. "I guess I'll come out tomorrow to get everything else..." she noted, looking at the collection of cherries before starting her descent. It didn't take long for her to realize that the tree she had climbed was... a lot... BIGGER than she anticipated. She could've sworn it was only 15 feet or so, but... peering over a thick branch, the ground seem a lot farther away. Taking in a deep breath, Lunette crawled onto the branch and tried to take a step onto another, but couldn't seem to reach it. She paused and shuffled her way back up onto the branch before trying again... and then scurrying back onto the thickest branch possible, tail fizzed up and large cat-eyes looking a little... panicked.

    "... Heeeeeeeeelp?!"

    How embarrassing.
    She was literally stuck in a tree, and mewling for help.

    "Aaaaaa--help?? Someone? Anyone?!"

    It was about this time she wished Collins or Boon had come along with her--but she said she'd be fine on her own. She wouldn't get in trouble. She'd be good and not bother with anything spooky or supernatural or interesting while out alone...

    Yet she couldn't climb out of a tree.
    Albeit a tall tree, nearly 30 feet in height, but still.

    "This was a bad ideaaaaaaaa..." she yowled pathetically, claws and legs clinging as if for dear life to the branch, tail wrapped around it in a spiral out of fear of falling.

    A squirrel approached her, chittering at her in confusion, though seemed more interested in her odd pleas for help. "Oh! Go! Go get help!" She encouraged... but the squirrel didn't understand her and just sat there, staring. Judging.

    "... Shoo! Go! Stop looking at me like that!"




    Lunette's stuck in a tree!
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    Re: Between A Branch and A Hard Place

    Post by Scaramouch on Tue Apr 11, 2017 1:29 am

    Time/Date: ¿Ö橃¤º×ü‡?



    ~ blip! ~

    "Hiiii-YAH!"

    You know, this was the part. The part with the decisive blow, the part with the blood and guts, the part where a side character was written out of the story and exited stage left. Yeah, that part. Except, you know, there was a slight problem with the part. A slight problem that was about to become a BIG problem in three... two...

    ...Fwish!

    Nothing but air.

    "Huh...?" Cyan diodes flickered and servos whined to a shuddering halt. "Fleshy bodies don't go 'fwish', they go 'sssPHHLT', baby!" Sqwelp! Shunk! Plorkk! Schunk! Glurnk! Shluk! Sshhluck! Thwump! His auditory processors could literally spend every single gigahertz meticulously combing through all the onomatopoeias in their databanks, and they still wouldn't come up a functioning logical operator; he'd only fry all the quartz-crystal in his head, go figure. Where his hearing failed, his eyes did not.

    There.

    Was.

    No.

    Body.

    The boys down in central processing were having a field day.

    Scaramouch bent at the knee and aimlessly wiggled his dagger in front of him, as if willing for a body to magically appear. Fwish, fwish, fwish! "What the ski-ba-doo-doodily-bap-swee-do-dee-bop heck is THIS, babe!? Where's the freakin' body? There's supposed to be a body!" No, try again - which he did, only to be met with the same frustrating result. Oh, and... something else. Something green. The robot paused in his tomfoolery and glanced down. "...Oh hey, is that, like, grass?" Optical lenses zoomed in with a tiny whir. Blade, sheath, roots... Yep, that's grass, alright. That's like the poster child for grass. Huh, weird... He could have sworn there wasn't any gr - "IS THAT A FREAKIN' TREE!?" Quercus robur, actually; the English oak. He didn't care about that detail, though, because there was a freakin' tree standing exactly 2.34 meters in front of him when there should have been a rough estimate of .8 tons worth of limestone. Limestone! How does a tree miraculously take the place of limestone!?

    It doesn't, that's how. And he didn't need to be a robot to figure that caper out (no offenses to toasters). The next mystery would prove far more challenging - maybe to the point of total system failure.

    There wasn't just a tree - because that just wouldn't be terrible enough - but several trees. Actually, there were over sixty trees within a 100m radius (he pointed ignored the bean counters for a precious, little something called sanity.) Scaramouch didn't even register the dagger leaving his hand. "Wh... Wha..." Holy crap, he was in a forest. An honest to Aku forest! HOW DOES A FOREST TAKE THE PLACE OF A RUINED CITY!? LIKE, WHAT EVEN, MAN!? Reason was the first to skip town and panic seamlessly took its places, so there was naturally only one thing left to do.

    Spoiler:


    He screamed.

    "AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!"
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    Re: Between A Branch and A Hard Place

    Post by Lunette on Tue Apr 11, 2017 2:28 am

    Well, this was just silly.
    Fifteen attempts later, all resulting in a scurry back up into the highest part of the tree, and Lunette was all out of ideas. Squirrels weren't a help, despite their odd generosity of sharing acorns with her, and birds flew away out of fear of a predator. She could scream--maybe those big dumb ears of Collins' would actually pick up on her shriek--but her yelling morphed into more of a squeak the higher it went. Her supplies did include a rope, but it wasn't really for climbing... it was more of a tugging rope--helping her move large roots or rocks that had been stuck in the boggier areas--and too short to actually be of use. Jumping was rarely an option as her weight made falling far more dangerous and easier for her to hurt herself.

    So...
    Now what?

    "HMM..." Eyes squinted, looking up at the gentle pink petals in a deep, irritating thunk. Taking in a deep sigh, Lunette's brow twitched as she closed her eyes, trying to calm herself down to think more rationally about this situation--even if it was stupid.

    Mind pushing the panic aside, her thoughts began to order themselves slowly...

    Deep breaths in...

    Deep breaths out...

    "AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!"

    Broken from her state of ease, her tail had fizzled, ears perked forward and eyes grew wide in befuddlement.

    "... What was that?"
    What on the Breach could that have possibly been? It definitely didn't sound like any animal--unless it was a very strange sounding bird? Though, if she didn't know better...

    it kind of also sounded like someone screaming.

    'Huh, I wonder if someone else is stuck...'

    *Slap!*

    Lunette's hand made contact to her face, feeling stupid even considering that to be an option. No one would be as thoughtless as her to climb a 30 foot tree without some way of getting down! Shaking her head and dragging her hand down her face, she began rubbing her chin in thought. If it was someone, she could, hypothetically, yell back to them and attract their attention. If they were in trouble, she could at least throw them a weapon, and, if they were nice, they could help her out of the tree! Though...

    That nagging feeling of worry and doubt reminded her that, despite how nice people can be, there are still bad people out in the Breach. It had been a while since she met someone who'd actually openly hurt another, but that possibility still existed. Whatever the case, Lunette could either keep quiet and risk hurting herself falling out of the tree, or take a chance and maybe get an assist. At least with the latter, she could offer them a nice meal for their kindness.

    "... Eh... might as well try..." she said, sighing heavily before standing up against the tree and bellowing out a simple

    "HEEEEEEEEEEELP!"


    ...


    And now to wait and see

    if this was a good idea or a

    HUGE mistake.
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    Re: Between A Branch and A Hard Place

    Post by Scaramouch on Tue Apr 11, 2017 3:19 am

    "I'm gonna DIIIIIIEEEEEEAAAUUGHaahaaaaaa...!"

    If this were a performance about a lone robot marooned in a strange and terrifying forest, Scaramouch was certain he would have won, like, a prize or something. As it stood, however, the robot was far too busy moping on his knees. "Energy is low, food is scarce...!" he whispered frantically. Not that he would need organic foodstuffs, but it helped build immersion. Metal hands rose to the sky pleadingly. "Come on, babe, what did I do to deserve this!?" No one would of course answer, and Scaramouch knew better than to rely upon the sadistic whims of a hypothetical deity. Overcome with hopelessness, he slumped and let out an artificial sigh. "Stupid..." That's what this entire situation was. Despite his best efforts (which were very good, if he said so himself), the robot couldn't make heads or tails of, well, anything. Don't believe him? Check the diagnostics report.

    Global Positioning System: Unavailable...|

    Nearest Wi-Fi Hotspot: Unavailable...|

    Access to Cellular Network: Unavailable...|

    "Tch, great... What's the good news?"

    Battery Life Remaining: 26%...|

    Estimated Time Remaining Until Battery Saver Mode: 02hr 36min 45sec...|

    "Ugh, forget I asked, babe..."

    Well, there Scaramouch had it - the cruel, bitter mistress that was reality. Communications were offline, he hadn't the foggiest idea of where he was, and now he had a draining battery seemingly without any means of charging it. Terrific, great, super. The only thing he could do was sit on his metal derriere and mindlessly pluck blades of grass, chin resting on the palm of his free hand. "So, this is how I'm gonna go..." he murmured, glum. "Not with thunderous applause or old age, but by shutting down in the middle of some stupid, extremely-inconvenient forest. You know, I bet there's a tragedy floating out there about this exact predicament." Or, you know, a comedy; if this was some sadistic puppy's definition of humor. Sigh... He could always just... take his chances and walk. Of course he might stumble into something nasty like a bear, or worse, accidentally traipse into a group of salvage-hunters and find himself scrapped for spare parts.

    ...On second thought, a dead battery wasn't such a terrible idea.

    It was still dumb, though.

    He shrugged and idly picked up his dagger. "At least there's still a bit of sunlight. Maybe I can - "

    "HEEEEEEEEEEELP!"

    Scaramouch craned his neck and snapped, "YOU AND ME BOTH, BABE! Now quiet down, will ya!? I'm trying to grapple with some inner angst here. You're ruining the mood." Sheesh, the nerve of some people. Hey, wait a minute...

    Someone else was nearby!

    Like a jackrabbit set on fire, the robot sprung off his rump with an ecstatic click of his heels and could hardly believe his luck. He might not die today, hooray! What deity did he have to worship and kiss after this (please, please, pleeeeease don't let it be Aku...)!? "Disregard that!" he shouted. Eyes darted wildly as Scaramouch spun around, dizzied. Where had the voice come from, where had the voice come from... It was nearly impossible to discern with a forest this dense; the reverb was positively murder! "Ugh, freakin' trees... Keep talking, babe, keep talking!" So help him, if this ended up in a foul trick or prank...
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    Re: Between A Branch and A Hard Place

    Post by Lunette on Tue Apr 11, 2017 3:53 am

    Cupping her ears daintily as they twitched, listening to anything and everything around her, hoping there was some kind of response.

    "YOU AND ME BOTH, BABE! Now quiet down, will ya!?"

    ... Well alright then.

    "Rude," she said as her nose curled up into a slight sneer. What, had she interrupted something? Resisting the urge to ask what their problem was, Lunette sat back down with a plush plop and huffed, ears flattening backwards until she heard an unexpected response.

    "Disregard that!"

    ... Whoever this person was, they didn't sound too on-the-ball, but requested... for her to continue, if she was hearing right. Shrugging, Lunette responded,"uh... okay?" Squeaking out the last word, she stood back up and began squinting as far as she could see into the dense foliage line. Nothing really stood out--no shimmering light of a fire, no fireflies or eyes, no flashlights--OH! Lunette snapped her fingers and quickly opened her bag, shuffling a few things around before pulling out a flashlight. "At least I remembered you!" she said in an appreciative manner before turning the light on and pointing it into the forest.

    "I'm--uh..." her voice cut out before she could continue, thinking carefully. From the way it sounded, the person wasn't too far off, but... they certainly weren't right next to her. Maybe they were... west? "I--don't know my current position, but it's a big pink tree!" Surely someone couldn't miss a pink tree, right? There weren't many cherry trees around to begin with, either...

    "I have a light on, if that helps at all!" It was a pretty decent flashlight, too! Those nice sturdy ones used for blunt attacks against people who may or may not be a creepo, specifically. With any luck, that part of its use would not be needed for this encounter. Keeping the light steady and moving it around slowly, Lunette continued to survey the perimeter until she needed to respond.

    Boy, if it was neither Boon or Collins, she was going to gut-punch the both of them when she got back.
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    Re: Between A Branch and A Hard Place

    Post by Scaramouch on Tue Apr 11, 2017 4:16 am

    "I--don't know my current position, but it's a big pink tree!"

    A big, pink... tree.

    Scaramouch twirled on his heels and blinked. Well, he sure didn't see any pink trees nearby. "Uh... Y-Yeah, sure, workin' on it, babe." This was gonna be like looking for a needle in a haystack, wasn't it? Oh, but hey! The flashlight was a dandy idea; you know, if it was actually night. He openly sighed for what must have been the umpteenth time. "Oh boy..." the robot muttered, wearily rubbing a metal temple. Okay, time to break the situation down.

    There was someone else here - check.

    They were currently stuck in a big, pink tree - check.

    They were also waving a flashlight around - check.

    What could he possibly do...

    He thought about leaping into a tree and using it as a vantage point, but the threat of a declining battery just wasn't appetizing. To make matters worse, it was going to be dark soon... Wait, dark! That's it! With a brisk snap of his fingers, Scaramouch was once again all smiles. "You got this, baby, you got this!" Hey, words of encouragement were important in trying times like these. If the dark won't come to him, then he was going to come to it! Or, something like that. He reached up and fiddled with a concealed sensor. "Okay, let's see... How about reducing luminosity to 75%?" The world darkened and it felt almost perfect, but he still couldn't see any beams of light. "How about... 35%?" Aaaaand then everything went black. Pitch-black. "Oops! Too dark, too dark... uh, 55%?" His trial and error paid off big-time.

    Even though it wasn't ideally close, the robot spotted just enough light to pinpoint the other person's location. Well, he hoped so, anyway... "Heeeeeey, I see ya, babe~! Keep waving that thing around. I'll be there in a jiffy." Scaramouch took one step forward, and -

    THWACK!

    And received a face-full of bark and needles.

    "Ouch!" Freakin' TREES. Looks like someone forgot about his visual settings. "Ugh, increasing luminosity back to 100%..."

    This day couldn't be over soon enough.
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    Re: Between A Branch and A Hard Place

    Post by Lunette on Tue Apr 11, 2017 4:44 am

    "Heeeeeey, I see ya, babe~!"

    The more she heard the other's voice, the more Lunette could tell they didn't... sound too bad. Or familiar, now that she thought about it. They sounded rather friendly, actually, and that was a relief to those dark thoughts in the back of her mind. And with confirmation of the other party being able to see her flashlight, it raised her spirits a bit, her tail swaying in an excited manner. She'd be able to go home and never, ever go tree-climbing for stupid, delicious fruit ever again. Instead, she'd stick to the greenhouse and just have Collins or Boon fetch things from trees--see how they like being stuck and unable to get out...

    Really, she had been gone for hours, and told them she was going into the woods. Did they think she scuttled off to the city instead? "Those dingles..." she huffed, lackadaisically moving the the flashlight about. Besides getting stuck in a tree, at least she collected a good amount of cherries, right? She glanced over to the basket that was currently tied to a branch for safety, her stomach grumbling a little.

    Lunette had only eaten a few cherries today, huh? She didn't even get to eat breakfast, she was so ready to go out into nature and collect things, and it was a great day until this... "Hng..." she still felt stupid.

    Oh.

    Oh no.

    This complete stranger is going to think she's an idiot, won't they?
    A cat getting stuck in a tree... They'd probably laugh at her or make jokes, even if they seemed to be super nice. With such a situation, it was kind of hard not to make fun. She was even making mental jokes at herself! But whatever. Yeah, it was 'funny', and if they did make fun of her, she'd just laugh it off. At least she learned to never do this again without a buddy around... maybe she'd bring Livewire next time, and show her how to pick out the best of the batch.

    A light purr started up at such a cute idea, Lunette stopped waving the flashlight around for a bit as her mind went elsewhere. Probably not the best time, but hey, she was stuck in a fucking tree.

    So shut up.
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    Re: Between A Branch and A Hard Place

    Post by Scaramouch on Tue Apr 11, 2017 5:08 am

    ...And whaddaya know, they stopped waving their flashlight around - the exact opposite of what he told them to do.

    "Of course - of course - the only other person in this forest is freakin' Einstein." Scaramouch took particular care in not saying that above earshot, but for crying out loud! Would it kill the person to be more helpful? ...Well, maybe not, considering they were stuck in a tree. Oh, pardon him, a pink tree. How does that happen, anyway? The robot was genuinely curious. Did they, like, get blown in by a tornado or something? Seemed rather odd...

    As fate would have it, Scaramouch was about to get his wish. 'About' being roughly eight minutes and twenty seconds of stepping over loose rocks and fallen twigs. Geeze, he sure picked a wrong time to wear heels.

    Trick question; it was never a wrong time to wear heels.

    The robot finished his brief power struggle with a dense row of shrubs and forcefully emerged through the other side. Ugh, he was gonna smell like dirt and leaves for weeks, but worst of all... nature. He spat out a bit of foliage as if to spite her. "Okay!" Scaramouch called out. "I, uh, think I'm pretty close, babe. Do you mind shining some light my - whoa..." Never mind. He apparently had found the tree in question, and boy what a tree it was. Pink blossoms, thick sable bark, and a huge - and Scaramouch meant huge - trunk. The behemoth must have been at least 28'! Impressed, he couldn't help let out a low whistle. "------♪~! Boy, that is one giant cherry tree." What were the odds of them getting this big, geeze!? Well-oiled joints creaked as the robot looked up, his cyan eyes roaming through the tree's knotted maze of branches. Hmm, didn't see anybody up there... "Ooooookay! Uh, can you like, get into view, babe? Can't really spot you from down here. You know, with a modest gap of 28' and all." Just a modest one.
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    Re: Between A Branch and A Hard Place

    Post by Lunette on Tue Apr 11, 2017 5:37 am

    What a time to space out and imagine having a nice, cheery day with dear Livewire!

    It was a nice thought, but Lunette quickly snapped back to reality after hearing a whistle. "Hm?" The thick branch she was on creaked slightly as she shifted to lean over, tail swaying carelessly, and took a look at her would-be-rescuer. No need for a flashlight considering they were here, and she was able to see just fine that they were... very tall. "Hello, dear~" she waved and gave a sheepish smile, "I'm up here."

    From the look of them... they looked very metallic--somewhat similar to her own gunmetal markings--and had eyes that lit up similar to Livewire and Knock Out. The thought of them, perhaps, being a small Cybertronian came to mind. The only thing that threw her off were the clothes and those fabulous boots, however. While she hadn't known any robots that actually wore clothing, barring Livewire and her adorable sweaters, this tall stranger was quite fashionable and very robotic-looking. Hopefully they wouldn't gank her and take all her stuff. "Pardon me for asking, dear, but are you a robot? Also, uhm... could I ask you a favor of maybe... helping me get down somehow?" Lunette made sure to sound as innocent and non-threatening as possible, just in case they weren't actually friendly.

    "I'd be happy to repay you somehow if you did help!" She quickly added, though the original reward of a nice home-cooked meal was tossed out the window. Maybe energon could be a viable substitute?

    "By the way, I love those boots."

    Just slathering that honey.
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    Re: Between A Branch and A Hard Place

    Post by Scaramouch on Tue Apr 11, 2017 6:08 am

    And what a time to space out and gawk at the person who needed rescuing!

    Honestly, Scaramouch didn't know what he expected. A regular human being, perhaps. Or maybe some slimy, plate-covered alien. But this? Oh, but this absolutely took the cake! It must have taken him ten whole seconds to eventually find his voice, and when he did... The robot limply pointed, remarking, "Uh... you're a cat." No, she was a fluffy bunny. Of course she was a cat! A cat stuck in a tree and in comical distress, but the fact that she was a cat stuck in a tree... When the present caught up with him, Scaramouch found it extremely difficult to keep from laughing. "M-M-Mmmphphph...!" Don't say it. Doooooon't saaaaay iiiii - "WHAT'S THE MATTER, BABE? COULDN'T RING THE FIREMAN!? HA HA HAAAA!" And who said the universe didn't appreciate a sense of irony every now and then, hah!

    He laughed. Ooooh, did he laugh. Scaramouch knew he was being an absolute idiot (c'mon, a pretty lady stuck in a tree and needed his help?), but he just couldn't help it. Gah, he was gonna be sick to his core with laughter...! The robot leaned forward and put his hands on his knees, attempting a couple of deep artificial breaths. Every time he sneaked a glance at her, though...

    "Ooh... Ooh... Ooohohoohoohoohoooo~!"

    Nah, this wasn't working.

    But a very angry dame might, and he promptly attempted his hand at smoothing relations. "S-Sorry, babe!" Which Scaramouch genuinely meant, even if his smile was on the verge of another giggle fit. "I've had a reeeeeeeeeally stressful day, so this was sorely needed. Thanks for that, by the way~!" Now, to answer her question: is he a robot? To answer truthfully or not... To answer truthfully or - "Nah, I'm just a clown wearing metallic face paint who only looks like a robot," he obnoxiously answered. Couldn't help it. Before she could respond to his insolent foolishness, Scaramouch held out his arms and gave a little pirouette, showing his whimsical nature. "You better buh-LIEVE I'm a robot, baby~!" Okay, this time he told the truth. He spun to a halt and clicked his heels together. Ooh, a favour? "Oh, so you do need a fireman, huh? Gee... to think I left my spare hose and suspenders at home. What a shame~!" And a favour with a reward attached? That was just the sort of thing Scaramouch liked to hear.

    "By the way, I love those boots."

    Forget the above.

    That was just the sort of thing Scaramouch liked to hear.

    All shenanigans ceased, and he looked up at the troubled woman with those great big cyan eyes. Never mind the honey, babe; flirt mode was officially on. "Aw shucks, you're gonna melt my processors, babe~!" Now he just had rescue her. The robot wouldn't be living up to his classical namesake otherwise! Scaramouch placed a hand upon his chest and began gaily rocking on those boots she loved oh so much. "Normally, I charge a pretty penny, but for you, babe... I'll do it for free." However, he did pause. "...Of course, I would also be super grateful for any information or assistance on just where the heck am I." Seriously, where the heck was he?
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    Re: Between A Branch and A Hard Place

    Post by Lunette on Tue Apr 11, 2017 6:55 am

    Theeeeeeeere we go.

    That snickering, that laughter... if she hadn't expected it, a lesser lady would've probably somersaulted themselves on top of this person and utterly crush their chassis, but no. Lunette was far better than that, and though she did roll her eyes and give a small glare, she waited patiently for them to get that out of their system. And every time they happened to glance up and start snickering again, she merely huffed, pouting more and more.

    Once they had regained the composure to speak without breaking into a fit of cackling, Lunette rolled her eyes softly once more and let out a sigh. As if laughing and making jokes wasn't enough, they decided to give a little sass, too? Sure, she wasn't in any position to sass back, but boy. BOY. The things she could say in turn... they sure provided enough material for some sass-backs.

    Either way, there was confirmation of them being a robot. How... fortuitous. Most robots were capable of carrying heavy objects, as far as she knew, so getting out of this tree seemed a lot easier. "Haha... fireman jokes," she waved dismissively and let the joke slide. With that compliment, though, the robot seemed to change his tone a bit, and agreed to assist her, which was just what she wanted to hear!

    "Normally, I charge a pretty penny, but for you, babe... I'll do it for free."

    "Oh? Thank you, dear~! I do very much appreciate your help!" A soft purr escaped from her throat into her words with a face that was pleased as punch, "I'll be happy to help and tell you anything you want to know! Although--and I don't mean to keep pestering on and on about it--I feel I'd be more comfortable if, maybe... I wasn't so high up." Lunette placed her index finger to her lip thoughtfully before looking closely at the robotic figure, tilting her head to the side. "Are you as strong as you are tall and graceful~?" she cooed, hoping to see if some more sweet words would get her any closer to the ground.
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    Re: Between A Branch and A Hard Place

    Post by Scaramouch on Tue Apr 11, 2017 7:44 am

    Oh - Oh. Ohhhhh, she was getting huffy~!

    Yes, he was being a pill. Yes, he was flirting with danger. But man if Scaramouch didn't like it! "Has anyone ever told you just how cute you look when pouting?" Shameless. Shameless, shameless, shameless. But! But, there was business to be conducted, and the robot wasn't an A.I. who strayed his eye off the ball. And whereas the dame's second compliment was like the sweet, sweet angelic choir of finely-tuned harps, he also wasn't a miracle worker. "Sorry, babe, but I ain't exactly cut out for physical labor, you pickin' up what I'm throwin' down?" Which, again, was the truth. Just look at these delicate ankles and wrists, babe! Did this look like the body of a brute?

    "However..."

    That's right, however.

    In one fluid motion, the robot slipped a hand into his pea coat and miraculously conjured up... a flute. Yep, a flute, and it was a polished black-and-silver, clearly the prized treasure of someone who enjoyed the arts. Scaramouch gave it a skillful twirl around his fingers and pointed it upright, giving the slender instrument a gentle shake. "I may not be the strongest cat around, but no one plays a pipe meaner than me, babe~! Hope you like jazz!" Now, what to play... He tapped the flute against his lips with a thoughtful frown. Would she prefer a quick, jaunty tune? Something in allegro, maybe? No, no... It was far too late in the day for something so upbeat and heart-pounding. Besides, being stuck in a tree was probably very distressing. Hmm, should he go with something in larghetto, then? No, that didn't sound quite right either... She'd likely fall asleep and kersplat on the ground. Ugh...

    Never, ever let it be said that Scaramouch wasn't a passionate musician. It was evident in the way he paced around in a tight circle, evident in musical grumbles of 'blues', 'big band', 'cool'. What decade should he play from? What had a good rhythm? What was he in the mood for? Finally, after deliberating with himself for five minutes and appearing like a loon, Scaramouch decided.

    The ear-to-ear smile was indicative enough.

    "Okay, babe, sorry for the wait! Jazz is just one of those genres where you got loads to choose from." He looked off to the side, voice lowered. "I just hope I chose something you might like..." Not everyone cared for jazz, so...

    Without further ado, the robot cleared his throat and raised his flute into position, lips curled into a closed smile and at the ready. Ya ready, babe? Oh, and before he forgot...

    Wink~!

    Perfect. Now he could play. And play that robot did, the air resonating with an energy so profound, so soothing, that it could only be called one thing: jazz, babe, jazz. That cool, night-warming allure of jazz. Let the music speak and carry you away...



    Listen for about a minute:


    *Curiously, the inviting notes of Scaramouch's flute accomplish something... weird; as if everything in the general vicinity wants to reach out and dance in one, concerted movement. And, in a way, something does.

    Before her very eyes, several boulders easily weighing as much as a person heave out of the earth with a great shudder and float over, gathering at the base of the cherry tree. They bob and weave in perfect synchronization with the music, revolving, and smoothly make their way up and around the tree's trunk. One stone stops. A second soon follows. And another, and another, and another, until... the last glides in front of Lunette's feet and rests. Together, they had made a makeshift stairway for the woman to gingerly return to earth...


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    Re: Between A Branch and A Hard Place

    Post by Lunette on Tue Apr 11, 2017 8:34 am

    It wouldn't be the first time she's been told her pouty face was cute.

    And like a slap to the head for assuming, Lunette seemed a little disappointed this robot didn't have a strong arm, apparently. But he would still assist her, somehow, and she patiently waited and watched as his deft fingers whipped out--a flute.

    Buh?

    Tilting her head to the other side, a bewildered look on her muzzle, what could a flute possibly do? "I do like jazz," she replied softly, kicking her legs idly as she recalled another who used a flute. The woman with the rats that scurried and scampered and scavenged--ICK! A shiver went down her spine as she recalled Nessa and her flute abilities. While Nessa herself was a... curious lady... Lunette was still not fond of rats. Clasping her hands together and eyes focused widely upon the black and silver instrument, she prayed there wouldn't be a flurry of rats once he started playing.

    The robot paced tightly, apparently taking the choice of music quite seriously, not bothering to play until the right tune was chosen. Now, while being high up made her sick and terrified, there was one thought that came to mind as she watched him pace impatiently... 'How does a robot play a flute?' Truly, it was a mystery--no lungs, no known 'air' effects that she knew of, except maybe a fan or vent...? Is that what they used? Oh jeez...

    "Okay, babe, sorry for the wait!"

    Oh--he finally chose something. After a little mumble Lunette barely heard, he so kindly displayed his ability to produce sound from the flute, something that still baffled the cat lady, and began with a nice slow tune. It was quite nice, actually--almost seductive--and while mystifying to watch how articulate his fingers were, her attention was drawn away by... by...

    Flying rocks.

    That was... new. And as if that wasn't strange enough, they were swaying and bobbing to the jazzy tune, forming something together that took her a moment to realize... "Oh!" It was a staircase! Wow, that was convenient and awesome. Gripping her basket tightly, Lunette carefully stepped down each boulder and hopped down onto the sweet sweet ground she desperately missed.

    "I swear, I'm never climbing trees ever again." Sighing, it was really quite obvious now just how tall this guy was! Maybe it was the heels that added to him, but boy, she couldn't help but purr and look at him in a mystified manner. Oh, and speaking of manners... Lunette gave the robot a small applaud for his triumphant and musical number, "that was lovely~! Thank you, dear..." Doing a little curtsey, the feline held out her hand daintily to him, "I'm Lunette, by the way. Thank you again for your help--it was horrible up in that tree all alone!" she gently purred as she spoke.

    "This is Portal Breach, by the by... if you want to know why you're here, well..." she gave a soft shrug, "portals seem to randomly choose people and spit them here at the most inconvenient of times..." Boy, did she know that feeling. "If you'd like, I've a place not too far from here--a mile or two... It's out of the forest and you can see the city in the distance! It's a really lovely view." Because, frankly, she too would like to get the hell out of nature. That was enough nature for today...
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    Re: Between A Branch and A Hard Place

    Post by Scaramouch on Tue Apr 11, 2017 9:20 am

    "I do like jazz."

    Oh be still, his fluttering power supply.

    A beautiful lady, compliments on his boots, a captivating jazz solo... Scaramouch took back what he said earlier; he wanted this day to last forever. No sooner had the woman placed her final step on the ground and was a safe distance away, the energy jarringly... stopped. With a mighty thunder, the boulders fell back to earth at the precise moment Scaramouch took his lips off his flute. "Glad you liked it, babe! It's a famous jazz standard known as 'Harlem Nocturne'; 1939, Earle Hagen and Dick Rogers," he grinned happily. It pained him to cut the performance so early, but the music had ultimately served its purpose. For now, anyway. The robot was far too enamored with Lunette's, as she called herself, curtsy.

    Stowing the flute away, Scaramouch bowed at the waist and took her hand, even going so far as to remove his paddy hat like a proper gentlemen. "Enchanté, mademoiselle." He could do a rough translation, but the phrase sounded much more romantic as-is. Maybe next time~!

    The robot spun the rim of his hat on a fingertip as he straightened his posture. Parting was such sweet sorrow, but alas! Their hands were destined to pull away and return at their sides. "Scaramouch is the name, and rescuing beautiful dames is the game~! It was no problem, babe. After today, I'm not much a fan of trees either." Lunette... pretty name! Little moon. Apt, given the silky color of her fur. He gave his hat one last spin before placing it back upon his head. "...Portal Breach?" Wow, he... he never heard of the name before. Scaramouch did know of the portals, however... His cheerful grin slightly soured at the recollection of his... abduction. "Ugh, yeah, you're tellin' me," he grumbled. Inconvenient was perhaps the biggest understatement of the century. Like, why would portals just randomly pluck folks out of thin air? Didn't make a lick of sense if he were asked. Maybe that's why he was robot-napped...

    "I'd honestly love to crash at your place and kick it, babe, but I kinda got a schedule to keep," Scaramouch continued, politely declining Lunette's invitation. Love ya, babe, but a certain bounty wasn't going to collect itself! He pivoted on his heels and glanced over a shoulder. "Now, if you'll excuse me, I really oughta get - "

    WARNING!! WARNING!!

    Battery Life Remaining: 13%...|

    Estimated Time Remaining Until Battery Saver Mode: 01hr 18min 22sec...|

    WARNING!! WARNING!!

    Ugh, give him a freakin' break, here!

    "Oooooooooon second thought..." Scaramouch turned back around, slowly this time, and flashed Lunette a sheepish, faltering smile. "I-I, uh, kinda need to recharge... You know, um, that thing we robots do? It's k-kind of important, so..." In other words: he had a change of heart and accepted her invitation - assuming there was juice, otherwise... "Ha ha, this is so embarrassing~!" he confessed through gritted teeth. Holy toledo, was it embarrassing. Bumming electricity off someone he just met, how low! "Do... Do ya mind, babe? I hate to mooch off ya, but if I don't recharge soon, I'm just gonna crumple into a motionless heap and, ha ha, shut... down..." Every robot's worst nightmare, aside from being scrapped.
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    Re: Between A Branch and A Hard Place

    Post by Lunette on Tue Apr 11, 2017 10:06 am

    Huh! Lunette had seen many things, such as demi-gods that could control sand and weather, the appearance of multiple prayer slips into barriers and even the arcane arts but... never really anything like magical musical robots. That was a new one, and it was both baffling and fascinating!

    If not for her plush fur, a hint of a blush would've came through as the musically-inclined robotic showed a wonderful display of manners, which was always a welcomed treat. Lunette's face scrunched into such a smile as her purr grew louder, "I like that--Scaramouch~ It's cute!" It sounded familiar, too, but it wasn't really the time to remind herself why. "Mmhm, Portal Breach..." she nodded and confirmed, feeling as though she had forgotten something else. It wasn't good news, either, but before she could recall, the sass-bot seemed to have other plans in mind, and declined her offer for a quick rest stop.

    "Ooh? If you're sure..." she purred and thought he could find his way back to the tavern if he so desired. She still needed to give him something in return, and it wasn't too hard to miss. As the towering bot twirled around, Lunette held up her hand to wave him good bye, but it was short lived as he spun back around and that Cheshire smile curled back over his metal face. Recharge, huh? A coy grin flashed across her face before placing her free hand on her hip, "you're suddenly interested in mooching off my kindness, hm~?" Snickering, her coy grin became a genuine smile as she began walking past him a bit, hinting she'd take the lead. "It's perfectly fine, dear. It's not too far. Do you think you can last 2 and a half miles?"

    Did walking take up a lot energy? Or maybe that musical teaser? If he did use too much and suddenly stop walking, she'd have no idea what to do! She was very much not a mechanic. Whatever the case, Lunette took a step back over to Scaramouch with a tilted head and mentioned, "if you're too tired, I could carry you!"

    Yeah, you heard that right.

      Current date/time is Sun Sep 24, 2017 2:43 am