Portal Breach: The Collision of Worlds :: v.4.0


    Nascence [Week 7 - 9]

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    Re: Nascence [Week 7 - 9]

    Post by Kev on Mon Mar 16, 2015 6:06 pm

    ...What, he didn't even have to put a shield up during the physical portion? Kev blinked up at his instructor. But weren't the shade of Mr. Dark, Hellboy, and those Doctors still able to hurt him if he didn't put them up? Or was Judge Fear saying that, since he had conquered them, even without the shield he would be safe? Apparently it was the same for the second section, which he had probably finally conquered in it's entirety today. The third section, the final section...that was where he needed to begin. Where he needed to focus his attention and his shield. "I thought the shield had to be up the entire time...my mistake, sir." He had wondered why there was a shield for the second section, when they didn't necessarily attack him at all. He figured the shield was more 'metaphorical' or something.

    "Understood, sir." Discussion would have to wait until the spiritual section. The Judge's nails lightly tapped Kev's head, and more then anything the urge for a scratchy cropped up. No scratchies, not right now. Right now was professional time. A professional doesn't give their cadet scratchies. The Judge had finished the psychic surgery, and gave him fifteen minutes until the next exercise started. "Yes, sir." The room warmed up as soon as Judge Fear left it, returning in ebbs and flows of a comforting warmth that he took refuge in. His eyes slid shut until he was in a brief sleep. It was relaxing, though still brief as soon his eyes popped open and the alien sat straight up, gaze fixed on the clock. Good, he still had a few minutes to get outside! He swept the blanket off and folded it up neatly, placing it on the back of the couch before he walked out the door and went to their usual spot for the spiritual exercise. Although the physical exercises were now a welcome challenge, and the mental was no longer frightening to him, he still found this part to be his favorite. Kev walked around the side of the cottage and found the Judge by the creek. He came to stand in front of the Judge, ready to hear the advice in full.

    "I'm ready, sir."


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    Re: Nascence [Week 7 - 9]

    Post by Fear on Mon Mar 16, 2015 6:20 pm

    A psychic shield was good for a psychic attack. This was by and large true. But was it really necessary to shield against something so insignificant? The physical woes were nothing, as were the emotional trauma Kev was now beginning to overcome. No longer were they obstacles that invoked dread in his heart. Rather, it was the latter half that consistently bested him time and time again. This is where he needed to focus. Ah, but tomorrow... Tomorrow, and hopefully the alien will put these new experiences to good practice.

    It was peaceful near the creek, where seldom a wandering intruder or unwanted guest roamed. Just the ghoul and his current means to an end. More trouble than the alien was really worth, but it beat going about it the old-fashioned way. The acerbic scent of nicotine wafted about through the refreshing meadow air, ghostly eyes latching themselves onto the approaching Kev-Mak-Tarr.

    "Mm," the Dark Judge puffed, not entirely in much hurry for anything. Time was of little important to the dead.

    The epitome of a sore thumb, Judge Fear wasn't hard to spot in the natural outdoors. Wherever he traveled lingered death, and by now the luscious grass of his habitual sitting spot had withered away into a dull, lifeless brown. It was perfect for the judicial likes of himself. "Have a ssseat," he commanded, a grotesque talon pointing to a fertile clump nearby. Over there, where you weren't liable to give him a headache. Enjoying his smoke and idly puffing away, the Dark Judge went about Kev's spiritual training in predictable fashion: he opened it up with a question. "What ssshall we dissscusssss today, cadet?" inquired a curious, weary Judge Fear. Tell him, tell him... What consumed your thoughts, what burned away at your very core? Whatever it was, he very much wanted to know. And do hurry it up, because the local insects were thinking to make a regular diner out of his rotten host.
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    Re: Nascence [Week 7 - 9]

    Post by Kev on Mon Mar 16, 2015 6:33 pm

    As if the sight of Judge Fear wasn't enough to clue Kev in on where the ghoul had gone, the smoke from his cigarette was enough to lead the alien right to him. Like a freight train, he was, though it made the alien a little wary. He stood before his instructor, who had seated himself comfortably on the usual patch of grass. By now, that patch of land was dull and brown. After weeks of having a corpse lay his butt down upon you for a seat, it made sense that the grass would die. Perhaps after training, Kev could try to tend to it. Or...if by then, the dull brown grass had withered away, he could till the soil and plant new blades of grass. Maybe even a patch of yellow tulips...

    Kev followed the gesture of Fear's hand, finding the area of grass he was directed to and sitting himself down. He brought his knees close and rested his arms on top of them, looking back at his instructor. Fear asked what they would discuss, and Kev glanced down at the grass as he pondered. What had been the major issue for that last part? Well, there was a lot to take in...but the Judge had given him advice there. If the alien waited until the beginning of that section to start putting up his bubble, perhaps it wouldn't feel overwhelming. He wouldn't feel stretched so thinly. As for the actual experiences he had seen...what stuck out as being the thing that threw him off so much? What broke his shield each time today? "I guess...we discuss the nukes, sir." Kev glanced around, making sure they had no intruders or eavesdroppers, before he looked back to his instructor and continued. "It is...harder to make my peace with them. I tell myself that it is alright, that everything will work out in the end, and if it doesn't, then that is fine. I...I try to make myself be alright with it, but...it always seems to throw me off. Seeing that nuke drop makes me...freeze up."


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    Re: Nascence [Week 7 - 9]

    Post by Fear on Mon Mar 16, 2015 7:03 pm

    "Seeing that nuke drop makes me...freeze up."

    Naturally, cadet, naturally.

    "You have ssseen many world disssassstersss before," spoke the ghoul. His smoke flared up brilliantly, embers softly crackling in the afternoon zephyr. "Phazon, deitiesss, rampaging robotsss; what'sss the difference? Death isss death." The method was of no consequence, really. Ah, but Judge Fear knew. He knew that the alien wasn't completely enamoured by the idea of dooming every living creature on this rock to nuclear hellfire. A pity... Here the Dark Judge thought that they had been getting somewhere. "You are no ssstranger to death, mm... During the Portal-Alpha catassstrophe, you witnesssssed the demissse of many. Did you freeze up then, cadet? No, you ssspoke to the ssself-proclaimed god of godsss and tried to barter." That took stones, it did.

    But perhaps the ghoul was going about this too... methodically. Truly, watching a warhead drop might as well have been a falling star. He'd perhaps wish upon it, observe the magic happen, and then go about his business unchanged. Death was inherent to living, just as decay was a component of all things. It bothered the fiend not. A great plume of cancerous smoke left Judge Fear's helm and accelerated the process for a handful of adjacent gnats.

    "Whatever will be, will be. You are powerlesssss to ssstop what isss already in motion, cadet. Whether our plan sssucceedsss and we exterminate all life on thisss world isss not for any of usss to rightfully know. I have come to accept thisss, ssso why haven't you?" Food for thought.
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    Re: Nascence [Week 7 - 9]

    Post by Kev on Mon Mar 16, 2015 8:19 pm

    That was true, yes. Kev had seen this world nearly end many times. He'd even seen it nearly end under the trident of Alpha. Phazon had covered the city, Gods had made playthings of the people, robots attacked others, Mr. Dark brought out the worst in people...he'd seen it all. It wasn't the last time either, more of that would happen in the future. According to Judge Fear, you seen one death? You've seen them all. And in a sense, he was right. Disasters weren't quite so scary, and the threat of his own death didn't bother him as much now. "But I've never had a direct hand in causing death like this before, sir. Widespread death, that is." Kev had killed one person at a time, mostly Jak and Daemeon. Jak, for his own good and Daemeon, for Fear. Anyone else had been lackeys to a bigger problem. Like the Elites. The Judge brought up Alpha's attack, when he killed many people, many of them that Kev saw from atop a building and cared for. In Terra's case, he actually felt the death too. "I didn't freeze up, no..." He waltzed up to Alpha and attempted to stop him with words. Tried to convince him to kill the ones who'd killed X, but not the entire Breach. But those words meant nothing to Alpha. Kev was shrugged aside and spared, for the moment. A cruel mercy.

    Kev fiddled with the grass idly, passing the time before the Judge spoke again, at which point Kev's attention settled back onto him. Indeed, even if Kev pulled out of training and any contact with Judge Fear, that wasn't going to stop him from nuking the place. Judge Fear was the kind of man who didn't stop. He had aces in the hole and he kept going. He kept trying. Kev couldn't stop him even if he tried. The Judge stated that he had accepted that his plans were in the air. He might exterminate all life, and he might not. He merely accepted it as it was given and went on with his plans. "It isn't like I haven't tried...I have. But I just wind up lying to myself. The truth is, I haven't accepted that your plans may or may not kill everyone I care about and destroy this entire place. I understand that your plans could fail, but I haven't...embraced this entire thing. And I know that you've tried to help me accept it. You've given me permission to fight with my friends, you told me that even if this place were nuked, people would die and come right back after a week. It does help, it does. But..."

    "You're actually comfortable with letting him brutally kill people."
    "wwhen the worlds burnin kevv and you wwatched fear do it youd better fuckin remember this"
    "Fine, I shall admit that I do not wish to live forever. But I want to die on my terms."

    The alien sighed and rest his head upon his own knees. "But I know that if my friends ever found out...if they ever knew I helped you get these nukes, I don't think they'd care about why I did it. They won't care that they were able to come back, or that we stopped it, if we do stop it. They won't care that I helped them try to stop it, and they won't care that you would have gotten it any other way and Ridley got to die because of it. What'll matter to them is that I chose to help you get nukes, that would have killed everything. And they'll...they're going to hate me for it."


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    Re: Nascence [Week 7 - 9]

    Post by Fear on Mon Mar 16, 2015 8:42 pm

    "...Direct hand?" That merited a snort from yours truly. "Utter nonsssenssse," Judge Fear hissed. "Are you pussshing the button, cadet? Are you the one who devisssed thisss entire plan?" Of course not, so don't be asinine. "Ressst assssured, cadet. You are guilty of damning your sssinful friendsss, but you are not "guilty" in the sssenssse that you are the one ultimately at the helm. That would be my brother and I." As was proper, and it just so happened that the Dark Judge wasn't the least bit concerned. Why? Everything he strove to accomplish was for righteousness. There was something Kev said; something that didn't make a lick of sense, and the ghoul was quick to note this. "You are not lying to yourssself," said he, the bringer of the inevitable. "How can that be true, cadet? Are you to tell me that you are lying to yourssself even now, dessspite the fact that you have been undergoing rigourousss training for the passst sssix weeksss ssstraight?"

    So many inconsistencies, so many irrational doubts in the alien's vexing skull. It was enough to drive the fiend insane, yet he willed himself to remain composed.

    That was, however, until he heard this.

    "You're actually comfortable with letting him brutally kill people."
    "wwhen the worlds burnin kevv and you wwatched fear do it youd better fuckin remember this"
    "Fine, I shall admit that I do not wish to live forever. But I want to die on my terms."

    It was as if lightning at struck him, Judge Fear erupting into a fit of soul-rattling laughter. "HA HA HA!" Pardon him, cadet, but just listen to yourself. He could literally howl and jeer all day if it suited him. Fortunately for the alien, the Dark Judge had far more important business to attend. Like telling a certain numbskull that he was being absolutely ridiculous. "Them?" Judge Fear snorted, not bothering to conceal what he thought. He took another hearty drag of his smoke and hissed, "Murderersss, the whole lot of them. Murderersss and hypocritesss. Who are they to judge, hmm? Montiago, the inhuman witch who hasss tasssted blood; who hasss reveled in it. Ampora, the unssstable grey-child that hasss no qualmsss about killing thossse who oppossse him. And the monarch... Ah, the monarch... Hisss handsss are now ssstained red, tainted by the trillionsss of livesss he hasss dessstroyed. Do not be ssso naive, cadet. Your friendsss, mm... Your friendsss are no better than myssself; I, however, wield no illusssionsss to romanticize my perssson. I will dessstroy the living and usssher forth an era of lawfulnesssss. There isss a sssaying that I think you ssshould be made aware of: better the Devil you know than the Devil you do not. Fitting, don't you agree?"
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    Re: Nascence [Week 7 - 9]

    Post by Kev on Mon Mar 16, 2015 9:10 pm

    Listen to that snort. Like a horse, he was! "I'm not pushing the button, no, but I am handing the button over to you." It was true, however, that he was not the one who concocted this plan. He was not the one who thought it up, he wasn't at the helm. "Alright...you are right, sir. But the fact that I am guilty of damning them is...hard. I'm not the one who planned this all out, but then doesn't that mean I'm just a tool or something?" A tool who would deliver the button to the ones at the helm, and perhaps to some people, that would be even worse. Kev blinked as his instructor seemed to find what Kev had said to be erroneous. "When I say I'm lying to myself, I mean that I tell myself that everything will be alright when the nukes have fallen, that there won't be some sort of fallout or anything and I can just wash my hands and walk away without any sort of consequence. But in the end, I don't really think everything will be alright. I try to make myself accept the nukes, but...I haven't really accepted them. I just...circle back to how things might go wrong. And this isn't during training...I don't think I've come really close to accepting the nukes part of the mental exercises yet. But I think that this would be exactly why I haven't." Because he still struggled to embrace it. To embrace his future.

    Judge Chuckles wrote:"HA HA HA!"

    The laughter was sudden, loud enough to make the alien jolt and grab onto his own knees to steady himself. He stared with wide eyes at the Judge, who just laughed away at something that was apparently hysterical. Kev was bewildered by it, head cocking to the side when Judge Fear finally spoke. Murderers...? "Tasted...blood?" When did Sonia taste any blood? The inhuman witch description also earned Fear a stink eye, though with Eridan, he couldn't exactly speak back to him. Eridan was definitely a high blood, and he acted like a high blood, which included a bit of...rage and violence, apparently. Eridan had admitted that his past was pretty bad, mentioning teaming up with a 'Jack'. And Zurg...when Kev had first come to the Breach, Zurg had still been in full villain mode. He was very aware that Zurg's hands were not clean. The Judge pointed out that the three Kev had thought of, the three who opposed Fear so much, weren't better then Fear himself. Fear pointed out that there were no illusions for his own acts, that he was very upfront about who he was and what he did. This was very, very true.

    "Yes, sir. I think it is very, very fitting." It was why Fear was better then Hazama, in his books. "Sir, Zurg and Eridan did do bad things in the past. But they are attempting not to do it again. It might not make their records clean, but I've always thought that attempting to redeem oneself counts for something. Sonia...I don't really know how she tasted blood, so I can't say. Maybe...you are right, and they cannot judge me for what I do. But they aren't the only ones who would oppose what you're trying to do. Oppose the both of us for..." Here the alien paused, staring back at the Judge before awkwardly covering with "...working...together." Smooth.


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    Re: Nascence [Week 7 - 9]

    Post by Fear on Mon Mar 16, 2015 9:39 pm

    Yes, it made you a tool. "I don't sssee the harm in that," was the ghoul's blunt answer. What, did the alien want everything to be sugarcoated? A tool was a tool, plain and simple, and Judge Fear was not exactly known for his, ahem, tact. "And thingsss will be fine," he continued. "The way I sssee it, cadet, your involvement ssshan't be exposssed. Ssso long asss you keep that telepathic noggin of yoursss mum and don't go about airing thisss busssinessss, no one will be the wissser. Of courssse, thisss isss your conssscience and not mine. Myssself? I prefer having it either in accordance with the law or entirely nonexissstent." Maybe it'll drive Kev to the brink of offing himself? That was a rather pleasant thought, wasn't it? Eh, maybe...

    "Ssso thingsss go pear-ssshaped... Ssso what, cadet? What are you going to do, eternally lament about it?" In short, there weren't enough eons within an eternity to sweat the small stuff. And this, cadet, was small stuff. Chains rattled as the ghoul shrugged, at peace with whatever the future brought. "You're helping to acquire weaponsss of masssss dessstruction and wisssh to sssee Ridley perisssh," Judge Fear offhandedly remarked. "Nothing isss free in thisss world, cadet. Either you pay the ferryman or you ssstay assshore."

    Nine months... Nine months and Kev still was in denial about all this. Mortals, oi.

    But they aren't the only ones who would oppose what you're trying to do. Oppose the both of us for...working...together."

    Uh-huh...

    This is the part where Judge Fear quietly keeps his unwavering gaze upon you, something malignant poking and prodding at your conflicted soul. There was a somber glow of the cigarette's end and then, "Sssmooth." Right, right - that. No reason to address it, because the fiend didn't think it wise to go down that particular road today. He merely kept puffing in-between Kev's outspoken thoughts, dissecting each and every single kernel confessed.

    "I don't sssee how you can feel dissstressssed about any of thisss," the Dark Judge admitted. Ancient joints loudly popped beneath leathery flesh, spindly legs re-crossing. "You've accepted thisss fate, whether you realize it or not. You've ssspent the lassst sssix weeksss training, you've continued to engage in civil dissscourssse with my perssson, and you've ultimately agreed to work together. To sssay that you are at oddsss with everything I have jussst mentioned isss the equivalent of you conceding to having made poor choicesss in the not-ssso-dissstant passst. Which isss it, cadet?" Are you 100% dedicated to the path before you, or have you been wishy-washy this entire time and just don't want to outright admit it?
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    Re: Nascence [Week 7 - 9]

    Post by Kev on Mon Mar 16, 2015 10:09 pm

    Well of course Judge Fear didn't see any harm in that...he wasn't the tool. Mmm, so long as he was more then just a tool to the Judge...if it turned out that this...all of this, was just the Judge wanting to get those nukes, he'd be mighty miffed. The Judge insisted that everything would be fine, for a very loose definition of fine. Fine for the Judge could mean the death of everyone. And as for people finding out, he insisted that all Kev would need to do is keep his 'mouth' shut. "Yes, sir." He'd keep his 'mouth' shut, alright. Not a single person would ever know. Well...except Prixlezub. Possibly Livewire, if she riddled it out. Livewire at least would be upset about not being told, not so much the nuke part.

    "Well, after this training sir, I'd rather not eternally lament about it. But it'd be awfully hard not to if I lose everyone I care about." Nothing was free in life, because life wasn't fair. In exchange for Ridley's death, he was giving weapons of mass destruction to Fear. It was logical, a bit of tit for tat. He was scratching Fear's back, Fear was going to scratch his. This is what he signed up for. This is the bed he made, the path he chose. All of this, he understood. But that didn't mean he accepted it yet. That he felt guiltless for his part in this. It was difficult.

    The Judge stared right back at Kev, and through him even, and Kev could feel his presence wriggling around in his skull. Yeah...that hadn't been smooth enough. Kev directed his gaze to the grass, scales on his face a more vibrant green, before the Judge spoke up again. "Mmm..." Yes yes, very smooth. Thank the Gods for small mercies, the Judge deemed it unimportant to discuss that right now. No, right now was the nukes.

    "I've accepted it, but I also...haven't, I guess?" He looked back up at the Judge, feeling out of his element in trying to explain it all himself. "I'm not at odds with the weeks of training, engaging in discourse with you, or agreeing to work with you. I have no thoughts of leaving you or casting you aside, sir. I am fully in this. I'm going to help you do this. We will do this. I'm...just at odds with..." He grabbed at his skull and massaged his temples, letting out a soft groan. "I don't know. Everything else is fine, I can deal with everything right until I think about the nukes dropping. The...sight of that thing in the sky...about to drop and destroy everyone...it scares me. And I think about how everyone's going to feel. They're going to hate you, for trying to do that. They're going to hate me, for staying with you. They're upset with me now, and you haven't even done anything yet. Can you imagine after you do something like that? It's...it's the future, sir. The future, after those nukes get dropped. I'm...scared of the future we'll have."


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    Re: Nascence [Week 7 - 9]

    Post by Fear on Tue Mar 17, 2015 6:37 am

    "I've accepted it, but I also...haven't, I guess?"

    Kev-Mak-Tarr, ladies and gentlemen. But the ghoul could somewhat grasp where the alien was coming from, if only to properly criticize the alien's logic. "Ssso they will hate me... I am hardly concerned with how othersss may view our jussst professsssion." It took a special kind of arrogance to shamble around in the Dark Judge's soles. Though, to be fair, the old boy was getting tired of being routinely contained for what should be regarded as a job well done. "The future, mm..." He supposed it was something to respect, but he certainly didn't fear it. What was the future to an immortal spirit of the law? Indeed, what was the future to anyone here?

    "And how do you know that they are upssset?" An honest question from an honest, albeit overzealous, soul. The way Judge Fear saw it, Kev was fretting over 'what-ifs' and 'maybes'; a dangerous pastime. "You are assssuming too much, cadet," he hissed, reassuring the alien. "No one assside from Montiago isss rightfully upssset, and I have already ssstated that your involvement in thisss judicial affair isss clandessstine. Whether we sssucceed or not, I fail to underssstand the foundation for mossst, if not all, of your concernsss." This wasn't just the ghoul being bullheaded, though he was no stranger to ignorance. You were keen to state your fears, cadet, but what about the steps leading to them? How would the populace know of your assistance, how would they suspect the Dark Judges, how can you be so afraid of the future when it has yet to be written? "You know, there wasss a sssaying I read once; it wasss in one of the many booksss I've perusssed sssince your training began," rasped the fiend. How did it go again...? Ah, right...

    By now Judge Fear's smoke had been reduced to a disintegrated cinder, its burnt filter wedged between two bulbous knuckles. "Fear," he said, "F-E-A-R. Four very dissstresssssing lettersss, but they do not have to be. Fear isss a ssstate of mind, a resssponssse to the ssstimuli around you and within the psssyche. Asss Zig Ziglar put it, fear hasss one of two meaningsss: Forget Everything And Run, or Face Everything and Rissse. A sssimplified piece of advice, I think, but there'sss sssome truth in it."

    Which are you, cadet? Before the alien could answer, there was still more to discuss.

    "Thisss isss going to happen, cadet. There isss no ssstopping what isss already in motion. You know thisss, I know thisss, and, sssoon, everyone will. Why needlesssssly ssspend countlesssss sssecondsss angsssting over an event you have no control whatsssoever, when you could be better putting that energy to preparing for it?" Think about it, Kev: here you were, training night and day, to better yourself. And not just in order to help a genocidal pair of Judges acquire weapons of mass destruction, but also to thwart them. Come now... Do you honestly think Judge Fear naive? You were going to aid your friends. You were going to oppose the destruction of Portal Breach. And you were going to use what you learned throughout your training to make a difference. "I am not afraid of the future, nor am I afraid of itsss consssequencesss," he admitted. "And while I do possssesssss the ability to know fear itssself, I choosssse to rissse above it. Will our plan annihilate the living? Will our plan fizzle into a dud? Maybe, but I do not linger on thessse empty quessstionsss. My path isss ssset, my mind determined. I know what I mussst do and I accept thisss with vigour, though I have the wisssdom to realize that I cannot do thisss alone. We, cadet, are greater than the sssum of our partsss." Even if those 'parts' had conflicting interests.
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    Re: Nascence [Week 7 - 9]

    Post by Kev on Tue Mar 17, 2015 8:23 pm

    Judge Fear did not put much stock into the views of others, this was true. Kev had known about this for...well, even before he'd become friends with him. Kev had been rather antagonistic and the Judge really didn't care about what Kev thought. Judge Fear didn't care what anyone thought about his just profession, for he knew he was in the 'right'. So anyone who argued with him, it didn't really bother him. It was annoying, but it didn't cause him to stay up late thinking about the morality of what he was doing or anything. The future also did not bother Fear too much. Fear was mellow. "I know they are upset because they get upset with me, sir." If it looked like a duck, and quacked like a duck...though the ghoul may have had a point. "Uriel did get pretty upset...but he also didn't really do anything. Grodus acts...strange around us, kinda antagonistic...but you are right, out of everyone who has gotten upset, it's only Sonia who has actually stood up and declared herself to be your nemesis." Did a few people get upset? Yes. But perhaps that didn't necessarily mean that they were still upset. Fear was still pretty confused about why Kev had such a problem with it, from Fear's point of view it was all pretty logical. Everything would happen as it was going to, and there was no use worrying about it. It was as useless as worrying about the past. The past and the future were similar, in that way. Worrying about it was useless. It was a dying fight. It was a worthless fight. So why was he fighting it? He didn't really have a suitable answer for the Judge, and so he kept silent, merely staring ahead.

    "Hm?" What was this about a book? Kev looked back to the Judge as he explained, the alien enjoying a bit of irony that Judge Fear was telling him about fear. He would be the master, yes? In any case, fear was a state of mind, a response to stimuli. The letters that made up 'fear' apparently had two different meanings; Forget Everything And Run, or Face Everything And Rise. He made a thoughtful hum, furrowing his brows as he thought it over. Kev had been scared many times, but there were very few times that he actually ran away in terror. Instead, he usually wound up facing things head on. His gaze went back to the Judge, who pointed out the inevitability of it all. The nukes would be given to Fear, Fear would drop them, and then there would be a situation to deal with. The corpse insisted that rather then worry and fret over it, he should spend his time preparing for the nukes, preparing for the fallout. Preparing to fight. "I guess there is no use worrying about the morality of it all, or worrying about what everyone will think, when I've already made my choice..." The Judge was also determined and confident enough to go through with his plans, even without the ability to know if everything was going to work out. For all Fear knew, he might get trapped in another bottle, or sealed away in the Pool or something. Granted, he had an out if any of that happened anyway...but he still didn't worry about it. Judge Fear was going to enact his plan to the best of his abilities, because it might wind up killing every living person like he wanted. We are greater than the sum of our parts...that sounded familiar. Kev's head tilted to the side as he pondered. Did we mean just the Judges? Or did he mean Kev too?

    "I understand, sir. I will rise above my...fear of the future. My fear of what will happen, and how everyone will react." After all, though there had been moments where schemes and secrets had exploded in people's faces, there had also been moments where no such explosion or mass reaction had happened. If Kev kept his mouth shut...no one would have to know anything about Kev's part in this. ...Even if Ridley had made that deal in public with Fear. Maybe everyone forgot about it!


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    Re: Nascence [Week 7 - 9]

    Post by Fear on Tue Mar 17, 2015 9:31 pm

    Kev knew that his friends were upset, Kev knew that they would hate him, but did he really? Skepticism laced the ghoul's following question: "Are or were?" Uriel, Grodus, Sonia... Again, the only individual amongst this unrelated triumvirate harbouring a strong dislike for the Dark Judges was the witch. The music-blaring Nephilim? Aside from the single outburst urged by alcohol and poor impulse control, there hadn't been another incident since. Or so the ghoul was made aware. Livewire would have been the first to tell him, bless her. The same was true for Grodus; he was either just as reclusive or having common sense. "Do not be ssso eager to conjure enemiesss out of ssshadow," Judge Fear warned. To be wary of one's foes reflected a wizened mind, but to entertain paranoia would eventually lead to one's folly. "No one hasss opposssed usss or dared to lift a finger. There have been only Montiago'sss disssapproving wordsss and nothing more." This was not to say that there were no hostile feelings; they slithered about in the unguarded thoughts of iniquitous citizens, and Judge Fear was not hard of hearing.

    "The populace of Portal Breach cannot be bothered. How many timesss, cadet, have we voiced our righteousss goal before them? How many timesss have thessse sssupposssed naysssayersss directly confronted usss? None, cadet. They have yet to act," he rasped, promoting his statement with empirical findings. Recall all those interactions in the Sanctuary. "Ssso long asss they are kept in the dark, unwitting and content to go about their sssinful livesss, jussstice ssshall be ssserved uninterrupted."

    "I guess there is no use worrying about the morality of it all, or worrying about what everyone will think, when I've already made my choice..."

    He guesses...

    Judge Fear dismissed a hand in true nonchalant fashion, glancing off to the side. He was clearly the 'mellow' to Kev's 'stress tumour'. "Exactly, cadet, exactly. You've already made your choice, jussst asss I have. Though there isss uncertainty plaguing your mind and your erroneousss sssenssse of mortality dissstraught, your actionsss have already sssealed your fate. Embrace it, cadet, and ssee where thisss path takesss you." The point of no return had long been crossed.
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    Re: Nascence [Week 7 - 9]

    Post by Kev on Tue Mar 17, 2015 11:18 pm

    Mm. Mmmm. MMMM. "Were." He finally admitted. You got him, about the only one who was still upset was Sonia, and she was upset for...very complicated reasons. She wasn't even necessarily upset at Kev. So perhaps he was conjuring enemies out of shadow...though the alien shifted in place for a moment before he looked up to his instructor's helm. "When you see Livewire tonight, you should tell her the same. There have been times in the Sanctuary where the two of us try to ponder who would try to hurt you, and try to think up a plan or strategy in case anything happens. She's trying to be cautious but...it might be conjuring enemies out of shadow, like you said. We should still be prepared but...maybe not quite so prepared." Ready to pounce at every chance where it seemed that Judge Fear and themselves would be harmed. They ran the risk of turning out like Karkat, just as Prixlezub had warned him against. Do not make enemies out of shadow. Do not see enemies where there are none.

    And honestly...the Judge had a point. Judge Fear didn't lie about his intentions of beliefs. Anybody who came within a 3 foot radius of the corpse knew that he wanted to murder everyone who was considered living. It wasn't a mystery, or a secret. Judge Fear made his intentions known. There were those who disagreed, of course. People who didn't like Judge Fear. But when it came to actually attacking him...no one had. Maybe it was because Fear and Mortis were strong. Maybe it was even because of Kev's own friendship with the corpse. Maybe people just didn't realize what Fear could do, yet. But the fact remained that Judge Fear was a lot like Ridley; until he actually made a move, he was fine to move around and exist without facing constant struggles and strife. Even then, Judge Fear had killed people in the Breach. Daemeon had been killed, and where was his vengeance? The demon was just content to be a gnat in their ears. "You are right, sir. They have not acted yet...and if this'll be anything like Ridley, after their initial attacks on you for dropping those nukes, they will leave you alone. Except for a few stragglers, maybe." A person or two with a personal grudge, like Kev's grudge for Ridley.

    Judge Fear's mellow nature made him a little envious. Here the corpse was, actively planning the murder of many people and the destruction of the Breach, and he was at peace with it. Fear wasn't always at peace with his role in this world, true. Kev had been a witness to a couple of existential crises. But here he was...completely at peace with the future, with all of its uncertainties. Kev kept his gaze on the Judge, eyes scanning his helm for a moment before he spoke up again. "As long as I'm doing what I truly think is right, I can embrace this. I'm not going through with this to make you happy. Or even to make myself happy. At this point...I'm not even sure if I really hate Ridley. He's just someone who will hurt this place and these people. I think it is right to take him down. In taking him down, I'm also helping you to do your own thing...but I'm also going to help there as well. It isn't right that he gets to sit here and plot his next move. I've already made my plans with you, and we are smack dab in the middle of working towards that goal. It isn't right to back out of this now...right sir?"


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    Re: Nascence [Week 7 - 9]

    Post by Fear on Wed Mar 18, 2015 1:24 pm

    And there you have it, straight from the alien's melon: were.

    It wasn't exactly breaking news that both Kev and Livewire had spent a few nights in the Sanctuary puzzling over who was friend and who was foe. What else were they going to do, remark how the Dark Judge's memory wasn't what it used to be? "Preparing for the worssst isss not necesssssarily a poor decissssion. Rather, one ssshould not make sssomething out of nothing." In short, there weren't a lot of outspoken protestors for any of them to rightfully plan against. Barring the witch and her horde, naturally. "But yesss," the ghoul agreed. "I ssshall assssuage the femme'sss concernsss and reduce her level of anxiety." Which was dreadfully hard, considering how Livewire was a Cyberwhat'sit. And of course Judge Fear had a point; he was full of them, didn't you know? You don't get to be several centuries old by being a lummox; though you could be downright incompetent enough to be contained multiple times...

    "The citizensss of thisss world will rissse up initially, yesss. Neverthelessss, they will not make it their missssion to confront usss on a daily basssisss." They didn't have the time and stamina, see. Perhaps the witch, but even she had more pressing matters to deal with.

    "It isn't right to back out of this now...right sir?"

    At this, the undead fiend shrugged. "You could end thisss now, if you ssso wissshed," hissed a level Judge Fear. "However, I would persssonally advissse againssst sssuch a choice. You are already halfway into your training, cadet. To quit now, after all you have weathered, would be an insssult." It wasn't as if the Dark Judge was holding Kev hostage. Should the alien decide, he could very well tell the ghoul to sod off and end everything abruptly. There would be no hard feelings on the ghoul's end. "But I think you right," he continued. "We are committed to thisss and I, myssself, intend to sssee it through. You can do thisss, cadet. I am certain of it."
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    Re: Nascence [Week 7 - 9]

    Post by Kev on Wed Mar 18, 2015 1:58 pm

    Preparing for the worst...they were preparing for the worst of the worst. In doing so though, they could be making something out of nothing. They usually brainstormed about anyone who didn't like the Judges or reacted badly to them initially. As Judge Fear had said, being upset at first didn't mean they were still upset. By actively thinking about the people who were upset when they first met Judge Fear, the two of them could be working themselves into a nervous frenzy. Which was why Kev was very relieved to hear that Judge Fear would talk to her tonight and help with her anxiety and fears. If anyone could do it, Fear could. Even if he didn't have the power to read her mind and know what was wrong, or project emotions to her. "Thank you, sir."

    Anyone who would have made Judge Fear a daily mission to overcome was long gone. People like Dani and Delila, Jak and even Samara. They were the type of people who would have focused on the Judge, going after him again and again, confronting him each time they saw him. Even then, though? Even if there were people who would still try to confront him daily? "It would be a little useless anyway, sir. Arguing and trying to fight you on a daily basis...it would be a useless battle, right sir? You and your brother aren't that easy to conquer or defeat." And they definitely weren't going to stop being Judges because someone got into an argument with them one time. Not after they had done their job for three hundred years.

    End this now...? The alien gave his instructor an incredulous look, arching a brow. Even though he could end it, the Judge advised against it. After all of the training he had already done, it would be insulting to just stop now. After all of the psychic surgery and help that Judge Fear had given him, to come to a screeching halt would be disastrous. "Perhaps I could end it sir, but that doesn't mean I should." Maybe during the first few weeks, it'd be alright. But now? He had made so many improvements. He had to see this through, conquer those challenges. Get over this hurdle.

    "You can do thisss, cadet. I am certain of it."

    "..." Kev glanced down at the grass. Judge Fear believed in him, as he always seemed to. He saw potential in Kev all those months ago, he consistently told him throughout this training that he would get through this, and here he was again...telling the alien that he could do this. "Thank you, sir. I believe that you are right. I can do this...I will do this, sir. I won't give up."


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    Re: Nascence [Week 7 - 9]

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