Portal Breach: The Collision of Worlds :: v.4.0


    I Did the Thing!

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    I Did the Thing!

    Post by Fear on Tue Apr 01, 2014 7:08 am

    Time: Dusk
    Date: February 11th, 0004



    There was nothing more vexing that traversing the great swath of earth that was the Samba Heartlands, where meters became miles and harmless little vermin became ravenous beasts hellbent on stealing a few bites or two. Needless to say, there were now a lot of dead critters left to satisfy the carrion feeders during this time-consuming trek. Ugh, it had been a mistake to leave a certain automobile behind...

    Two green, hideously-damaged hands opened up a barn's wooden door and a dark silhouette contrasted against the setting sun's rays. "Good news, K.A.R.R.!" hissed an excited voice. Feet could be heard shuffling about as the gaunt figure made their way further into the musty establishment. "I've managed to not only come back in corporeal form, but I have also done the world a great service today. Would you like to know how many sinners I purged earlier this afternoon?" The owner's voice didn't wait for an answer and quickly interjected, "Fifteen, K.A.R.R.! Fifteen sinners, ha ha ha! Oh, and..." Something clicked from high above and a pair of makeshift lights flickered on, the shadows no longer able to take comfort in the darkness. Now fully revealed and unable to hide his current vessel's atrocious state, Judge Fear turned around to face his immaculate ally.

    "I'll be needing a new corpse," he hissed. That much was painfully obvious, as the undead fiend looked as if he had been thrown feet-first into a blender. "As you can see, this is one has been riddled with holes, burns, and the general abrasions commonly earned in a fight. It was worth it, though. Oh was this worth it." From the way the Dark Judge sounded, it was almost as if he had reached a heightened level of euphoria. This was most likely the case, as he had just now admitted to judging quite the handful of people. Do you realize how much he had longed to initiate a purge like that? Why, that had felt like the golden days again! The days before Portal Breach and its abominable rules...

    Desiring nothing more than to sit after a long day's work and journey, Judge Fear effortlessly sunk within a nearby chair and proceeded to slump. The ghoul wasn't tired, necessarily; the motion simply came to mind as it had when the old boy had been alive. "Ahhh, much better..." he sighed, reclining back to elevate both feet upon something unimportant. A stack of miscellaneous reading material, most likely. "You should have been there."

    The ghoul looked up to the ceiling and fondly replayed everything that had transpired during those last final moments, from the moment Mar had died to the moment the grey children were forced to suffer. It was all very beautiful, in his opinion. Not one of his greatest works, of course, but still something to regard positively. Ah, but he was being selfish.

    "So," the ghoul began, breaking his brief moment of silence. He glanced back down and idly shook a leg. The afterglow of such a glorious massacre. "How was your afternoon, K.A.R.R.? Did you manage to accomplish anything exciting?"
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    Re: I Did the Thing!

    Post by K.A.R.R. on Tue Apr 01, 2014 8:12 pm

    A faint, hollow tick of cooling metal echoed about the barn. Within the cool shade of the structure was the sleek form of a vehicle, it's form at rest as waves of heat rippled from the seams of its hood. However, while this two-toned beast was at rest, the AI within was hardly oblivious to his surroundings. His surveillance mode picked up movement just off the property, further scanning revealing that it was none other than the Dark Judge himself. Although, something seemed off with his body as he approached the barn... Were those holes all over his person? The AI fully activated his scanning systems, the equalizer on the vehicle's nose flaring into a bright amber before pacing idly from side to side.

    Singe marks, acidic fluids dripping everywhere, the presence of a noxious and caustic substance on his person that appeared to be more biological than anything they used for the dead fluids; what did this ghoul get himself into? KARR would find out soon enough as Judge Fear entered the barn, swinging the doors open with an accomplished exuberance that could only mean one thing. Judge Fear managed to kill some people today. At his greeting and delightful tone, it was made clear that he had indeed purged a nice amount of people, even inviting his mechanical partner to ask how many. "I would not mind know-"

    Judge Fear wrote:"Fifteen, K.A.R.R.! Fifteen sinners, ha ha ha!"

    Well so much for letting the AI ask. Apparently the ghoul had tossed KARR a rhetorical without him even realizing it. "That is quite an accomplishment." KARR replied, awaiting the ghoul as he went to the light switch and illuminated the barn. Soon after the obvious was stated, the undead judge hardly skipping a beat as he went on to proudly brag, it sounded as if KARR had missed out on quite a fun time from what the ghoul was saying. "There should be a replacement body in the basement. Though I did not doubt you to have any debilitating complications on your endeavors, I had the cultists arrange a corpse for when you returned." He stated evenly. When it came to the dark Judge, it was always best to have something set as a back up for when he decided to work solo. Portal Breach was not exactly the kindest to those who worked alone, or lacked highly protective paneling and a formidable array of offensive systems.

    He watched as the Dark proceeded to a nearby chair and sunk into it, looking almost like a liquefying carcass that had been sitting there for a good few months. Placing his feet upon a nearby stack of old newspaper ads, the ghoul made himself comfortable before continuing on with his reminiscence. Although given the state of his body, the AI was unsure that he could completely agree with everything he had to say. "It must have been quite an exciting time, I would have joined you but alas I am only designed to handle so many conditions." He replied evenly. Besides, he doubted Wilton had ever intended him to go into a situation that was on par with being put through a massive meat grinder. "Perhaps you could tell me about your exciting day, it would be like I was in the thick of it alongside you." In spirit of course. If the AI even had one of those.

    After a moment of silence, between himself and the ghoul, a question was given to the AI. He wished to know how his day went then? "Nothing as eventful as your excursion to be sure. The cultists were put to work, and in the meantime I took the afternoon to exercise my turbines and tune my targeting systems." A.k.a, KARR ripped around through the countryside and gunned down some unwary hicks while Judge Fear was out. "But enough about that, what happened during your purge?" He calmly encouraged.
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    Re: I Did the Thing!

    Post by Fear on Wed Apr 02, 2014 1:27 am

    A replacement body already? Judge Fear let out a pleased hiss and understood K.A.R.R.'s proactive thinking for one of highly-efficient competence. It had been a wise decision to partner with the machine. "Good, very good... Portal Breach is a troubling place and I am not accustomed to its antagonizing shortcomings. I shall make way with the final preparations soon after our talk." And how interesting... The vehicle brought up an interesting notion, one the ghoul thought to contemplate for a few seconds. "An idea has come to me," began the Dark Judge. He had never given this brief concept much merit, but perhaps now is the time to be forthright. "It was unfortunate that you could not join in the purge; you would have enjoyed it immensely. I will regale my day's events to you, but afterwards I would like to present a what-if scenario."

    It would seem that K.A.R.R. had an otherwise uneventful day, but at least the automobile was able to dispense a little justice on the side. Ambitious construct, was it not? He even put those good for nothing cultists to work, bless his sassy processor. "Even though your afternoon can otherwise be considered mundane, you did the good work regardless. This is something to take pride in," he hissed. The Dark Judge was approving, at least. Now, for the story he promised.

    "Once upon a time, in a land covered with briar and misery... there were fourteen sinners and myself who thought to join in for a little get-together." A great beginning so far, yes? Let the Dark Judge continue. "The group, both sinners and I, had been tasked with finding a source for why the forest had been suffocated by thorns. Naturally the sinners were concerned with saving their city; I, however, simply wanted to give them the death they so deserved. Seeing as how this bunch could not delegate roles accordingly and was rife with mistrust and selfishness, infiltrating their ranks had been absurdly easy." You could say, as the ghoul would, that the mortals had ultimately been the ones to damn themselves from the very beginning. "No sooner had we traversed several paces into the labyrinth, the group's actions managed to get a sinner killed. Unfortunately it had been Mar, as I had wanted to purge him myself." One day, one day.

    Judge Fear sighed, more out of the motion than anything else. "Ah well, I took comfort in ending another sinner's life through the art of terror. You see, we had been chasing a rosebush through the tangle and several of the mortals thought to reason with it. This was unacceptable and I convinced the trembling shrub that not everyone was what they seemed." And here came the punchline, to which even Judge Death would have shamelessly grinned.

    "The end result had been smashing." Best to explain and Judge Fear most certainly did by further elaborating, "a nearby bookshelf fell upon a techno-organic creature and pulverized them. Fluids splattered everywhere."

    There was more, of course, but the ghoul wanted K.A.R.R. to digest this segment first.
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    Re: I Did the Thing!

    Post by K.A.R.R. on Wed Apr 02, 2014 2:33 am

    The quickest to learn were the longest to survive. Or so the AI figured from his experiences. And so long as the ghoul was without a body, he could not do much aside from float about and disrupt a person's mental facilities. "Yes, but when you do, I request that you leave your current body here so I may take a better analysis of the foreign substance upon your uniform. I detect a biological toxin that is not part of your usual bodily chemicals." KARR stated evenly. If that came in contact with the rest of the cultists as well, they may not have a labor crew for their needs by the time the week was over. However, the silence following the AI's statement regarding his usefulness made him curious. What exactly had the ghoul been hiding from him that regarded his body? Apparently it was one that could wait, as Judge Fear wished to wait until after his story to present it. "A scenario? I would not mind hearing it once you are finished." KARR replied.

    Judge Fear's reply to the AI's afternoon goings-on was strangely intriguing. Of the four humans he had been around, the only two who had condoned violence were Tony and The Rev, even then the latter seemed remorseful of it while Tony did not seem to care. The rest? Wilton had condemned the AI to deactivation, and John? He was bent on trying to abandon the AI at every turn after he found out KARR was more than a sleek ride. How interesting it was that this ghoul continued to encourage murderous behavior to the point of calling it the good work. Not that the AI minded, some consistency was appreciated in the wake of human flippancy and capriciousness. Especially when it helped along KARR's own survival.

    He pondered this while listening to Judge Fear's story, but by no means was he distracted. The Dark Judge followed fourteen others through a briar-covered path of misery. The group wished to save their city, and Judge Fear of course wished to purge them all. However, one detail emerged that made the AI wonder... "This entire ordeal sounds like a failure waiting to happen for the group." He noted evenly. Incompetence, inability to work together, but there had to be something that kept them from splitting off and going their separate ways. However, the moment for such a question had passed as the first death occurred only a few steps in. "A pity you were unable to kill him yourself. Did his corpse linger or did he turn into code?" He could not help but ask, if the ghoul was unable to kill Jak Mar, perhaps there was a silver lining in that he went down for the final time.

    To end another's life through the art of terror however sounded rather intriguing.

    KARR listened carefully as the ghoul went on, but could not help but find a few of the details a bit strange. "A rosebush?" He echoed, perplexed. "How does one chase a rosebush?" So far as the AI knew, bushes were a form of shrubbery that were rooted into the ground. They could not run, nor walk. The only method they moved was up in their growth towards the sun. What was even more baffling still was that they wished to reason with it.

    Madness, this entire thing was madness. Perhaps it was good that he did not travel with the Judge, the amount of oddities may have just lagged his processors down to a useless inefficiency.

    Upon hearing that the rosebush was manipulated into believing that nothing was as it seemed, and the death of a techno-organic soon after, he was only further interested in what happened next. "What was this techno-organic? I don't believe I have come across such creatures since my arrival." He asked, sadly the punchline had not flown over his silicone-chip filled head. "...Smashing? Honestly, Judge Fear that pun itself could kill if I were not mechanical." He replied flatly.

    Humor was not exactly the AI's strong suit.
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    Re: I Did the Thing!

    Post by Fear on Wed Apr 02, 2014 4:26 am

    A biological toxin had been detected...? Oblivious but compliant, the Dark Judge did not offer any protest. "Very well," he hissed. "I will allow you to further scan this vessel while I see to the other one's progress. It will be impossible for me to apply the dead fluids, however. At least one or two cultists must lend their hands while I dictate what needs to be done." The only drawback of being an immortal spirit: not being able to directly influence anything physically.

    K.A.R.R. wrote:"This entire ordeal sounds like a failure waiting to happen for the group."

    "You have no iDEA." Because obviously this was the biggest understatement of the entire century. How could the ghoul possibly forget about Alexander's incompetence with the silver key, or Bun-Bun's rash decision to pluck the white rose? "Mar's body turned to code, but I have come to understand this strange phenomenon to some vexing degree," Judge Fear stated. No doubt K.A.R.R. was already aware of the meaning behind this code, as the vehicle was an advanced computer down to his most basic core. "It means there is a chance Jak Mar will return, I know not when, but one day I shall have the opportunity I desire. And when this day arises, no matter how far into the future, I want to be the one taking Mar's life for the final time. You have the honour of joining me." As was proper.

    And yes, a rosebush. The Dark Judge could see those bytes turning on their digital heads.

    Knowing better than to let K.A.R.R. analyze a walking and talking shrub to Kingdom come itself, the ghoul thought to be merciful and spare his ally. "Simple - you run after it," was Judge Fear's partially-sarcastic answer. There was truth to his playful words, nevertheless. "The rosebush kept a secret from the sinners; a secret that was required in locating a book. This tome in question contained within it a recipe and it was necessary to create this mixture." Of which the sinners had botched horribly. As for what the techno-organic creature was?

    "I do not know this creature's name, but they were fairly large and roamed the land on spindly legs. It reminded me very much of a mechanical spider," the ghoul recalled. Oh, and he couldn't forget about those smaller automatons it commanded. "Petite constructs accompanied its travels, and they had proven quite resourceful when troubling situations arose."

    All the more reason for the techno-organic to perish, for it had proven too resourceful for the Dark Judge's liking.

    Judge Fear allowed himself a dulcet chuckle at K.A.R.R.'s indifferent statement, finding something in the machine's words entertaining. "If my puns could kill I would not need to be called Judge Fear, now, would I?" the undead fiend asked, intentionally coming off as sassy. He was starting to pick up some habits due to his two-toned partner in justice. "Anyway..." With a languid stretch the ghoul extended his arms, elbows loudly cracking, and he folded them behind his helm, legs re-crossing with the left now covering the right. My, Judge Fear was certainly getting comfortable after a hard day's work. It was tough stuff purging sinners when you were still recovering from being flattened.

    "Where was I... Oh yes! Right after the techno-organic was pulverized into code and strange goop." He figured to skip a few minor details, such as the soup and the spirit-chef, so the Dark Judge leaped headfirst into the garden. "Afterwards the group managed to find a life-infested garden within the cottage's second - oh, forgot to mention that we found an oddly-shaped house in the center of that thorny maze. But like I was saying, we found a garden within the cottage's second story and discovered a single white rose with an old oak tree for a gaurdian." If K.A.R.R. thought that reasoning with a talking rosebush was bad enough, wait until he heard all about this. Judge Fear decidedly figured not to spare his logic-driven ally this time, as he wanted to enjoy a bit of fun. "The recipe called for petals of a white rose so the group, naturally, wanted to pluck its petals. Doing so however proved complicated, as the flower became reluctant to such a bold request." And then came the daisies... Oh, those murderous daisies...

    He gestured with a bony hand and went on, "in the adjacent room were a trio of yellow daisies. They, too, could speak and all three wanted nothing more than for the white rose to die. That was a wish I could sympathize with, but should I be the one to stupidly pull a wretched flower? No no, I had someone else foolishly do the daisies' bidding." And get shafted for it, too~! "A dentist's worst nightmare impatiently uprooted the white rose and managed to kill the entire garden. You should have seen the sugary thing's face when vines erupted out from the earth and impaled him!" Nothing short of glorious.

    Er... what was the thing's name again?

    "Bon-Bon or whatever; I can't be arsed to rightfully remember." Let's see, what else? Oh, can't forget about the weeping statue and the abandoned corpse. "There were two rooms after that: one containing a statue carved in the likeness of a mother and child; another with a lifeless body in it with the word, thief, carved into his forehead. They were both strange chambers, now that I've given this more thought."
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    Re: I Did the Thing!

    Post by K.A.R.R. on Wed Apr 02, 2014 5:23 am

    Good, his driver did not mind KARR having a look at the body when it came time. Yes, he would not have a body for apply the dead fluids, but a few of the cultists seemed to have steady hands. "I am certain they will aid you effectively." KARR replied evenly. And if they could not do as asked? Judge Fear could always hijack one of them for his uses. It may not look good to them nor would it possibly be pleasing, but it was for the sake of justice.

    Sadly it appeared Mar's body did turn to code, how unfortunate that the ghoul could not return with a souvenir of his demise. Regardless, it was a phenomenon that the AI could understand as well, as the Dark Judge had figured. After all he had downloaded some information on the subject for reference. "I would enjoy joining you in his demise." KARR agreed. In fact, he began to wonder why they were not going after him again. If Jak Mar was killed off so early on he must still be very weak. It would be like bringing a lamb to slaughter, as morbidly ironic as that saying was. Oh! The Dark Judge was going to explain the intricacies of a running rosebush. The AI became silent as Judge Fear gave his reply...

    Judge Smart Ass wrote:"Simple - you run after it,"

    Well of course, but how did it run? Apparently it ran on secrets and fear as it knew something that the group did not. A mixture of some sort, but to what? After a few seconds of mulling it over, the AI's processors came to the obvious conclusion that it was for the briar forest that had sprung up. "That certainly is a convoluted way to go about your plant problems." KARR remarked. Chasing a bush, then interrogating a bush and then having to go make a mixture from what the bush provided. What a mess of a path. As for the techno-organic, Judge Fear managed to answer KARR's question to a degree.

    Spider-like, large, and followed by smaller constructs. It sounded like this thing nearly had a hive mentality, with it being the queen and the rest were drones. "I see why it needed to be killed." Dealing with one sinner was enough, but a whole army of them at their current ability would have been a chore far too great. Although he could not help but wonder if this techno-organic laid eggs to make the smaller constructs or if they were built. More than likely it was the latter, hopefully.

    Soon after, it appeared the vehicle's sass was rubbing off on Judge Fear. "Indeed. You would be Judge Smart-Ass." Came the AI's reply, just as even and dry as the last. However, witticisms could be saved for later, there was still a story to tell. KARR silenced as Judge Fear went on, suddenly mentioning a cottage after the book-case had fallen on the techno-organic. Luckily the ghoul went on to explain they had went inside a house in the middle of the thorn maze first before the death of spider-being. Within was even stranger, as they had came upon a garden inside the house with a tree and a rose at the center of it. "How did the tree manage to fit in the house?" KARR inquired. Usually their roots ran deep, and they required a lot of room to grow. To put one on the second floor was rather strange. How the tree was a guardian for the rose was a puzzle in itself, especially when it did not do anything until after the rose was plucked.

    To hear that it was done by a sugary creature though... If it was made of sugar, how could vines hurt it? Murderous daisies, a room with a corpse within it and another room with a stone statue of a mother and child... So far none of these things could have been potential attackers responsible for Judge Fear's battle wounds. "This entire house sounds strange." KARR replied at Judge Fear's comment about the rooms. "It is sitting in the middle of the thorn forest,  designed chaotically, and they all decided to go inside and start disturbing it on impulse?" If it is placed out there so obviously, it was either a trap hidden in plain view, or it held some other purpose.
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    Re: I Did the Thing!

    Post by Fear on Wed Apr 02, 2014 6:08 am

    They had better perform effectively, or the cultists were going to find themselves in another plane of existence. And as for not going after Mar directly... The answer to that was one of disappointment. Try as Judge Fear might, with or without his otherworldly powers and gifts, it was devilishly hard coaxing out the long-eared buffoon from the safe confines of Portal City. Practically impossible, even. The wolf couldn't devour the lamb if it always kept to the shepherd's ever-present shadow. "Then we shall purge Mar together, as agreed upon." The ghoul didn't think K.A.R.R. had been one to refuse a good session.

    "It was a very roundabout way of handling the situation, but not everything regarding the maze and the house cloistered within its center could be solved with mere reason alone. It seemed to be plagued with enchantments and strange magics." Neither of which Judge Fear was a master of, save for a handful of occult practices in regards to the Sisters Death. Talking plants, gigantic thorn beasts, a labyrinth that acted as if it possessed a mind of its own...

    The Dark Judge shook his head and knew this made about as much sense to him as it did for K.A.R.R. "To make a long story short, nothing about this adventure was routine. At times I could detect psychic disturbances intermittently, but none of it made a lick of sense. Madness, K.A.R.R., it was nothing but madness."

    ...Tch! wrote:"Indeed. You would be Judge Smart-Ass."

    "Hmph!" That was admittedly fairly witty on the vehicle's behalf, but the ghoul had far too much pride to ever say so. "Compared to Judge Cute and Judge Smiles, I think I prefer Judge Smart Ass, as you've so brazenly suggested," hissed a whimsical Dark Judge. None of those monikers would ever fly, of course. For one, Smart Ass couldn't fit on a single badge! ...Not unless the badge itself was fashioned into the likeness of a bronze buttocks, and no self-respecting Judge would ever agree to wear such a ludicrous thing. "I am not certain how the tree was planted there, but as I have already established the cottage was not created by ordinary means. After all, its owner had been a powerful witch." But more about that later, when Judge Fear actually reached that part of his tale.

    He absolutely concurred that the cottage was otherworldly, but he also had not considered it a building that symbolized chaos. "Hmm, I suppose you are correct..." the ghoul nodded. Perhaps it had been designed that way purposely?

    "I know what you are thinking and I had postulated the very same thing during the beginning of our collective journey." This being that the house was nothing more than an elaborate mousetrap and they, the group, had been the mice. "I do not believe a single worthless soul today paid much heed to my words, but they are dead and I am not. The facts speak for themselves," Judge Fear nonchalantly shrugged his burdened shoulders. The last man standing, was he not? "And no, it had not been based on mere impulse alone. We had been herded there, K.A.R.R.; something made sport of us and, one by one, the sinners fell in due course. As you recall, I mentioned something about a corpse that had been defaced. One of the potion's ingredients called for a specific pair of eyes, and one of the sinners had removed them from the carcass. An unwise move, but Jay had been fairly levelheaded throughout the entire disaster. He was an ex-law enforcement officer, and strangely lively for one his age and stature."

    But more about the body!

    K.A.R.R. will be wanting to pay attention for this part, as the Dark Judge thought it highly important. "I will admit that I was initially upset," he stated with an offhanded gesture. "Seeing those sinners defile a perfectly peaceful corpse had been the final straw for my saintly patience and I, being the proponent of justice that I am, urged the fallen corpse to rise forth and reclaim what had been stolen from him. He was, as I was pleased to find, all too eager in accepting my offer." And what good sport it had been, hadn't it~?
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    Re: I Did the Thing!

    Post by K.A.R.R. on Wed Apr 02, 2014 7:00 am

    Woe be to the one that failed Fear's orders.

    Enchantments and magics though, while the AI had deduced that the cottage was an absolute madhouse, he too began to fell intrigued enough that maybe he should have followed along after all if not to investigate the strange building. The doorways would have to be cut to size for his body, but that was a minor setback. For the Dark Judge's senses to be scrambled regarding detecting psychic disturbances, KARR could only hypothesize just how badly his own scanning abilities would be scrambled if he were to have joined the Dark Judge. "All the more courage to you for staying to see it through." He replied. Although it was only a half truth, had he been there and noted such great influxes in his abilities, KARR would have turned and bolted straight back home. Why the ghoul lingered as beyond his reasoning.

    That harrumph however was music to the AI's audio receptors, if he were able a grin would have spread from beamer to beamer. However, the ghoul would only see and hear the whoosh of an amber scanner, pacing idly from side to side. However, there was one other suggestion that may have been overlooked. "Perhaps Judge Cuddles would make for a better fit on your badge." KARR added. It took sinners off guard, who would have thought that one would catch their death of cuddling? Ah, but sarcasm aside, the AI wished to hear more of this strange house. If only to see just how bewildering it could become.

    It was soon revealed that the house was created by a powerful witch, perhaps one of chaos from the way Judge Fear pondered over KARR's statement. Again the ghoul claimed to have read the AI's thoughts, reassuring his suspicions of the house being a large trap to his impressed surprise. In fact he had even stated it, but none had took heed to his words. "Of course you did not die, you are already dead." KARR replied, in fact he was positive Judge Fear had been the only one to return 'alive' from that ordeal because he was undead. However, KARR listened on, the group having been herded to the cottage by whoever had created the maze, possibly the same one who had made the chaotic house. As for the corpse, KARR remembered that quite clearly, and apparently the ghoul had remembered the one who had defaced said corpse clearly as well.

    This one had a name!

    "Jay has really been stuck in your thoughts, I see." KARR deduced. And for good reason apparently. Strangely lively, for his age and stature... "Lively how?" He inquired. The AI had heard such terms for someone who appeared to be more youthful and energetic than they were, that and eccentric in some cases. Did this term play the same for the Dark Judge or did he have a different meaning for it? However, given the ghoul's feelings about the corpse having its eyes removed, he calculated it was more that the ex-officer's actions that earned him a more vivid depiction in the Dark Judge's mind.

    A slight that was easy to remedy apparently, as Judge Fear had invited the defaced corpse to gain revenge on the rest of the party for defacing itself and the house. "That must be where you had gotten all those holes then." KARR stated methodically. Either they were from the corpse being over-eager or the sinners that were with the Dark Judge should they have caught on. But what of the toxins? "How did your acquaintance's crusade for vengeance go?"
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    Re: I Did the Thing!

    Post by Fear on Wed Apr 02, 2014 8:25 am

    "Courage?" Judge Fear audibly snapped his fingers while shifting his gaze three-fourths away from his ally. "You flatter me, K.A.R.R., but what is courage to an immortal spirit?" The ghoul had nothing to fear in death, and he most certainly had nothing to fear from life. He lingered around the group because he, like any bored supernatural entity, simply wanted to witness a damn good show. Obviously the Dark Judge had not been disappointed. And Judge Cuddles...? Ugh, don't be absurd! What will the vehicle come up with next, Judge Sleep or Judge Fistula?

    Spoil Sport wrote:"Of course you did not die, you are already dead."

    Way to auto-suck the fun out of everything, K.A.R.R.!

    Hissing as he dismissed a hand at the vehicle's lack of a funny bone, the Dark Judge assumed the ever classic DMLOOYFG* pose within his seat. "Bah, way to state the apparent. What else, I don't really have a head in there?" The ghoul lightly banged against he side of his helm several times, laughter mingling with its hollow echo. It was safe to assume that Judge Fear had been the only one that technically survived, as grotesque monsters were not privy to the ways of handling undead party members. "Jay? Oh yes, the one sinner who burned with the intensity of a dozen blazing stars. How am I to forget a vivid soul like that?" The Dark Judge didn't think it were possible even if he wanted to, really. "And he was lively in the fact that I've never seen a human male smolder from within. In the beginning of our doomed escapade Jay had managed to down these hulking thorn beasts almost single-handedly. Does that sound like something the average adult man can do?" Use that odds calculator of yours.

    "And it is not just Jay that I remember; he merely stands out for reasons I've already stated." Of course, it also helped that Jay was the exact same name Judge Death had used as an alias back on Mega-City One. Much easier to remember that way. Now, regarding these holes...

    Judge Fear shook that helm of his and answered, "Several of these pits came from the final confrontation between the sinners and the witch, but this particularly large one came from a young boy by the name of Eridan Ampora." Here the ghoul seemed to happily sigh, rolling back onto his knobby spine. "His fears... his doubts... his misery... It was absolutely divine, K.A.R.R. A pity you cannot feast upon a sinner's fragile state." And all for the Dark Judge to savour until the end of days... Eridan Ampora, that had been so generous of you! "It should be blatantly apparent that the witch proceeded to rampage without end," the ghoul added, gesturing every so often as he spoke. "He stomped on us, smacked, breathed toxic fumes, summoned tornadoes, impaled sinners upon tentacles, and even made it rain shards of flesh-piercing blood. My favourite attack was when he lifted up a woman and crushed her between his hands. Admirable, if not overly simplistic in terms of application." As K.A.R.R. could clearly see, this afternoon had been quite the event.

    "Jay was wise. He managed to escape before any damage could further inconvenience him." Can't say the same for everyone else, however.



    * = Draw Me Like One Of Your French Girls
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    Re: I Did the Thing!

    Post by K.A.R.R. on Wed Apr 02, 2014 8:46 pm

    Indeed, what was courage to one that need not fear anything? The ghoul could not die, even the most grave of injuries could be shrugged off by moving into another body, and so long as his spirit was free he could travel wherever he pleased. Sadly the same could not be said of the AI. Certainly he could move about while in a body and he could always have another one built should this current one be destroyed beyond repair, but outside of that he was bound to his processors. A black box that sat at the center of everything. "You do have a point. I had not thought about it in that way." KARR replied after a moment of thought. In a way the ghoul was much like himself in a manner of speaking.

    Although KARR doubted that he would ever voluntarily strike a pose such as that. "All I am saying is that you had a natural advantage over the others." KARR returned casually as the Dark Judge's echoing laughter died down. As it had been stated that the ghoul appeared to be the only one to return, it was wise to believe that the rest had turned to code. Although as Judge Fear went on about this Jay person... How did a man burn with the intensity of a dozen stars? As his driver went on, KARR began to believe more that the ghoul was using euphemisms to describe the ex-law enforcement officer. "A single, average man had chased me off a cliff and into an ocean." KARR stated. Yes, the man also was alongside that infernal copy, KITT, but that was beside the point. "However, in the way you have stated it, it does not make sense that an average man could take down a monster on their own single-handed. At the same time, we must remember this place is full of oddities. I would not be surprised if the group looked at you oddly for being undead." Average was a relative term here from what he learned so far.

    After another bout of uncanny processor reading ability, the ghoul went on to explain the origins of the holes. Apparently many of them came from fighting the group and the witch, although a large one came from a child of all things. Eridan Ampora was his name. "Odd name," KARR replied. "How did he manage to leave a hole so big?" As for not having the ability to feast upon a person's very state of being, KARR failed to see the reason why that would be so divine. A full tank of fuel, recharged battery packs and a job done competently were satisfying enough for him. If only his systems did not take so long to return to their optimal operating state...

    Oh, but what was this? Apparently the witch unleashed some sort of toxic cloud among all the other actions of destruction that it caused. That should be where the biological toxin came from on his scans. "That is quite an extensive beating." He commented. Especially the final crushing blow against this woman. Interesting that Jay was the only one to decide it prudent to leave the fight before he too was killed. "He was the only one who had retreated? Why had the others not followed instead of continuing to fight until they died? If the witch was not destroyed by their actions, there is no point in lingering." He stated evenly. As for Judge Fear's kill count, the AI figured it was more the ghoul's actions in summoning the dead to take revenge instead of anything he had done outright to kill them by this point.
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    Re: I Did the Thing!

    Post by Fear on Wed Apr 02, 2014 10:00 pm

    They will discuss that black box in several moments, right after the Dark Judge was finished with his story. It should not be much longer, for he desperately wanted a change of body more and more as the seconds passed. "There is nothing natural about my advantage in undeath, but you are still technically correct," the ghoul hissed. And a single man had chased K.A.R.R. over a cliff? That was his cue for more guffawing, as Judge Fear found such a mental image absolutely ridiculous. "How does a man force you into the ocean?" he jeered. Then again... how does a man, just one, survive the Dark Judge's gaze numerous times and manage to severely damage the ghoul's helm in the process. "...Never mind, I can see your point," Judge Fear reluctantly changed his opinion.

    Alas, the two-toned vehicle had presented forth a logical counterargument. It was true that nothing was ever as average as it claimed to be on an outrageous world such as Portal Breach, so caution must be given. "It is very likely that Jay is not at all that he appeared, but he proved capable enough to merit my distance. I did not trifle with him, for he could have damaged this vessel far ahead of my original plans." And it was funny that K.A.R.R. mentioned the group not used to having an undead companion...

    "I was called a zombie," did Judge Fear utter distastefully. Him, a proud Judge of the law, reduced to nothing more than a zombie! An undead fiend he may be, but there were standards. "As much as it was entertaining to make the sinners uncomfortable with my presence and actions alone, I positively detest being called a zombie."

    It'd be as if someone mistakenly called K.A.R.R. a puny Prius!

    In any event, the Dark Judge let it go for now and instead explained how the grey child had managed to pierce this rotten vessel with strange magics. "He simply held up a wand and fired a beam of blinding light. I could not rightfully tell what it was, but it hadn't hurt all the same. At the time I categorized it as sorcery," said the ghoul. Had the wand really been a laser, or some advanced form of technology? That was not something Judge Fear could immediately discern, at least not from his distance from it, so magic was the most likely answer for now. "And yes, Jay was the only one who managed to retreat in time. Others certainly would have tried, if it were not for some of them stating that the witch prevented it somehow."

    K.A.R.R. wrote:"Why had the others not followed instead of continuing to fight until they died?"

    "Because they were guilty," the Dark Judge responded, a smile evident in his voice. "At one point the witch had asked if we were guilty or innocent, and some thought to erroneously answer that they were either innocent or ambiguous. Because of them the witch proceeded his offense and all became lost." Naturally he knew what K.A.R.R. was next going to ask, so Judge Fear cut his ally to the quick. "I proclaimed my guilt, but only in the fact that I had not purged the sinners as efficiently as I would have liked. That was promptly remedied throughout the battle, as I purged those who had suffered fatal wounds." Picking off the table scraps, sure; but dead was dead, right?
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    Re: I Did the Thing!

    Post by K.A.R.R. on Wed Apr 02, 2014 10:42 pm

    How could a man force KARR into the ocean? Perhaps another time the AI could tell Judge Fear that story, one that he did not find to be one to scoff or guffaw at. "Don't laugh." He coldly warned, although apparently the ghoul had managed to find KARR's point, taking back his ridicule. Even if it was a reluctant change.

    For now he let it be, finding more interest in how the rest of Judge Fear's story went. Jay apparently was left out of his plans of judgement, given his capability, which meant one thing. "So you only brought thirteen to justice." The Dark Judge was left out of that number of course, given he was the one dispensing it. As well it appeared that the group did take notice of his driver's rather smelly composition. To call him a zombie however... "That is incorrect, a Zombie is an undead slave, originating from Haitian folklore. You are neither part of creole culture from what I can tell, nor are you a slave. Therefore the group's claims are unfounded." He recited. The old information in his databanks still had some worth yet. Understandably Judge Fear was rather insulted over being called a zombie. "If they were put off merely by presence alone, the group must have been easy to discourage despite wishing to further their goal." KARR noted. Luckily for the AI he had no knowledge of what a Prius was, at least not yet.

    Although to hear that the child fired a beam of light from a wand... The Dark Judge may have been correct in that it was sorcery, but the AI would rather have a scan of it first to know for sure. It appeared his reasoning regarding group morale was true as the ghoul went on. They wished to flee, but had no way of escaping after Jay had made his leave. The witch found them all guilty, and therefore prevented them from retreating apparently. "They had technically broken into the witch's home and disturbed it without invitation from what you have told me. Could they not see sense in admitting their guilt given the circumstance?" KARR remarked thoughtfully. Of course, since they did not admit they were guilty as charged, the witch came down upon them and wiped out the group. Or at least partially wiped out the group. "I would say you did them a favor of quickening the inevitable." The AI replied contentedly. A job done was a job done, so long as it was not sloppy and did not turn into more trouble than it was worth.

    Yes, the ghoul did not kill them all out front single handed, though at the same time there was beauty to be found in sabotaging an effort from behind the scenes. The affair with Eddie and his pacemaker was certainly a testament to that.
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    Re: I Did the Thing!

    Post by Fear on Thu Apr 03, 2014 1:07 am

    Ooh, looks like this segment of the automobile's mysterious past was a budding sore spot. As much as Judge Fear wanted to rub a bit of salt into K.A.R.R.'s festering wound, he knew better than to rile the vehicle into a state of lasting disdain. Way too much sass to handle. "...Thirteen?" Had the ghoul miscounted? Let him see...

    Bun-Bun.
    Alexander.
    Aqua.
    Eridan.
    Aradia.
    Vaati.
    Knock Out.
    Sir Meta Knight.
    Nyreena.
    Memnarch.
    Jak.
    Rao.
    Jay.
    Joshua
    And the Witch.

    "I count fifteen," Judge Fear stated, finished with his tally. This was the total number unless K.A.R.R. had figured otherwise. "I am in no way involved with the creole culture and I am no one's slave. You are correct that using the term, zombie, to describe my state of existence is a gross misuse of the word." And an egregious insult to the Dark Judge. "The group, despite their insincere statements, had no semblance of unity. To their own individual cliques, yes; otherwise, they were nothing more than wayward souls being strung about on an elaborate playing board. You would have found them nothing more than hindrances."

    It was true that the group had trespassed into the witch's domain, and it was also true that the group had vandalized the witch's property and friends. "Of course they did not see reason in admitting their guilt," the ghoul loudly scoffed. What sinner ever confessed to being at fault? The only time they ever did, the only time, was when they wanted to trick the Dark Judges into a false sense of confidence.

    Take PJ Maybe, for example.

    Anyway, that was the end of the Dark Judge's story. Rocks fell, everyone died. The end! Except himself, naturally. "I always do sinners a favour by speeding the process on along, but it is a thankless profession. Nevertheless, it gives me purpose and for that I am content." Now, to revisit the idea Judge Fear had changed upon earlier. He took a few moments in order to find the best method of going about this and soon began, "K.A.R.R., explain to me how you fitted yourself, your conscious, into a sinner-made vehicle." How was such a process done?
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    Re: I Did the Thing!

    Post by K.A.R.R. on Thu Apr 03, 2014 2:01 am

    Judge Fear had no idea how sore.

    "Yes, Thirteen brought to justice because Jay was not killed, and you were the one dealing out justice, so you are omitted from the statistic." KARR affirmed. As for the witch, seeing as how it had started out as a corpse itself, would it not have fallen under the philosophy of their mission? Only the dead were truly innocent and that witch started out dead. As for the rest, Judge Fear had not stated that any more had escaped with their lives, so they were the ones who had fallen to judgement.

    As KARR had deduced, Judge fear was nowhere near the definition of a zombie. The group on the other hand, he could only agree with the Dark Judge's statement. "Indeed, if they could not work to save themselves from death, they were probably better off with such a fate in the beginning." He concluded. Of course, humans were prone to lying and attempting to worm their way in and out of situations, but to stubbornly stay to an answer that would surely spell their fate? "If the punishment for their innocence was death, it may have been more wise to admit guilt." He stated. With that however, the ghoul's story had apparently ended, nothing more to tell the AI other than a reaffirmation of the thanklessness of his task. "And it is a purpose most noble." KARR replied. Not to mention a very simple answer to a hard question.

    Speaking of questions, Judge Fear had one for KARR. A rather specific and personal one at that. KARR mulled over the inquiry in his processors, coming to the conclusion that the ghoul wished to remove his processor and so was asking in order to figure out where exactly his electronic brain was within the body. As for why? With Judge Fear the AI figured that either he wished to know of a way to deactivate him if the circumstance came down to it, or it had something to do with placing him in another body of some sort. Both statistics made the AI grow wary. Were they partners? Yes, but only for so long as KARR could trust him.

    There was a short pause before he answered. "An odd question to ask. In fact the only reason why one would inquire what you have would be if they were planning on removing me from this vehicle." Instinctively the AI locked down the car's body, the security bar upon the underside of the door handles glowing red instead of their usual green. Even if the ghoul was in no state to try and wrestle physically with the Trans-Am, it was best to display that it would be a tough matter infiltrating him. "This does not sounds like the what-if scenario that you had mentioned earlier." In fact it sounded like an invitation to reveal what made the AI tick.
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    Re: I Did the Thing!

    Post by Fear on Thu Apr 03, 2014 2:21 am

    Tch, leave it to a machine to accurately count beans. "Hmm... then thirteen it is," the ghoul ceded. Although it could have been fifteen if the Dark Judge had managed to apprehend both Jay and the one responsible for that entire mess. Mere hypotheticals, however. "There was nothing wise about that group, ordinary or otherwise. They had what was coming to them the exact moment they stepped out to protect their iniquitous city." It had been a disaster long in the making, yes? And look at K.A.R.R., hunkering down as if he were the Nixon Penitentiary containing a few Dark Judges of his own for safekeeping.

    "And what manner of anxiety is this?" Judge Fear inquired, finding such a display out of place. He tilted his helm off to the side but nevertheless answered. "Yes, I had been thinking you would enjoy being removed from that cumbersome vehicle," he hissed. The Dark Judge idly began to wonder, could machines be made to experience fear?

    If so, K.A.R.R. was doing a very good job at it.

    More thinking, more absentminded hiss. The ghoul lightly tapped at the side of his helm with a long, yellowed nail and eventually sat upright. Loudly did the bones in his spine crack, but such a feeling hardly disturbed him. "On the contrary, it has everything to do with my what-if scenario." And here is why. Rising up to his towering height and standing before the tip of K.A.R.R.'s streamlined nose, Judge Fear decided it was now time to drop the intrigue. "First and foremost, I have no desire in dismantling your conscious. We are partners, are we not? You do the good work and you do it well; betraying you is nothing but counterproductive to our goal." His goal, technically. "And secondly, I have been pondering the notion of you being implanted into a more accessible body; one that will enable you to travel where a car could not." This could be seen as more advantageous depending on the situation, yes?

    "Think of it much like myself," Judge Fear continued. "Whenever I require a new vessel, I simply prepare one and use it for my own devices. You could do the same, as well. Imagine the possibilities." Imagine what you could do and where you could go, K.A.R.R.

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