Portal Breach: The Collision of Worlds :: v.4.0


    Don't Break Its Back

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    Don't Break Its Back

    Post by Kev on Thu Dec 05, 2013 12:27 am

    Time: 12:59 PM
    Date: 12/4/2013

    It was a happy Kev that skipped from the City Noise to the park in the city. He was bundled up in a warm and oversized parka, with a hat situated atop his head and a scarf and a loaf of bread in his hands. Humming happily, he was pretty eager! The subject of ducks had come up and Cailia had insisted that ducklings were cute but that adult ducks...were not. The shame! Adult ducks were just as cute as their wittle babies! They deserved their love too! They had decided to meet in the park where there'd be tons of ducks. Cailia would know she was wrong, Crowley would probably enjoy the show and Kev? Kev would just enjoy the company.

    He walked into the park area and took a seat on a bench. He placed the loaf on his lap and patted it contently, craning his head around to see if Cailia or Crowley were here yet. No sign of them yet. He decided to kick his legs in the meantime. He rather liked ducks, and this was a good excuse to come and feed them! Would they like the bread? Ungrateful little fowls better like them...he worked really hard for this bread!


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    Re: Don't Break Its Back

    Post by Cailia Hallow on Thu Dec 05, 2013 7:45 pm

    Ducks.

    Cailia didn't even like ducks. Or the park, but mostly ducks. They were small, loud and smelly. The ducklings were okay, only because they were yellow and fluffy. However that summed up the only positive things about ducks in a whole. So as she walked, encased in a fully buttoned coat with her hands shoved down deep within the pockets. It was right at the temperature that made Cailia feel as though it was the perfect time to crawl back into a warm bed and sleep. Hibernate or Feed Ducks. Wow, what a close tie.

    Grunting quietly she saw the one and only Happy Kev and wanted to turn right back around, because this was not going to be fun with those ideas Crowley had graciously put into the mouthless alien's mind. She was going to have to find a way to get even about this, against both of them because this was certainly worth pay back. All in good time, maybe during this escapade she'd figure out just how to do that. Watching as Kev seated himself on a park bench, she smiled impishly and stalked quietly and closer and kept her breathing low. Coming to a stop a foot away, her smile only grew larger.

    Reaching out her hands, she grabbed Kev's shoulders and with an pulling him back, leaned down swiftly and whispered the softest of truths, "Adult ducks are hideous." Before releasing him from her grip and walking around the bench to sit down. "By the way, Hi Kev. Cold out, isn't it?" Looking around as well, then to Kev's other side she rose a brow. "I think you are down a collaborator, Kev. Here's to hoping he comes soon, so I can further start proving you wrong." Because those ducks were UGLY, and Kev would come to know this.
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    Re: Don't Break Its Back

    Post by Crowley on Thu Dec 05, 2013 8:02 pm

    Here we go then. The park. Crowley'd hardly known this place existed, much less visited. Ducks weren't exactly fun prey, given that there was a forest to hunt much more interesting food in, and distance wasn't really a factor when you had wings. As it was, he was walking into the park much as the other two had, except his clothing was unusual in that it was exactly the same as usual. His one concession to fitting in was a pair of black gloves made from some sort of leather covering up his otherwise very pale hands, which were at present tucked into the pockets of his dress pants anyways, so it wasn't like it mattered all that much. He was being very careful to avoid stepping on slippery patches of earth, and the even worse wet grass patches, as they would play hell with stains on his shoes; the pants would be fine.

    He arrived just in time to miss the whatever Cailia had done to Kev, and walked into sight range and spotted the two of them just as she had sat down and begun talking to him. He arrived next to the bench with a crooked grin and a fairly normal comment, for him. "Chilly out, isn't it?" With a wave of his now visible gloved hand, he indicated the park in general. His eyes, behind the shades, had taken particular notice of the bread in Kev's hands, and had begun thinking of ways he could make this fun without either of the other two attempting to push him into the water in revenge, because that would suck royally.
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    Re: Don't Break Its Back

    Post by Kev on Fri Dec 06, 2013 3:54 pm

    While he waited for his companions to arrive, Kev decided to poke and prod the bread he'd bought from the store. Seemed soft enough! He undid the tie around the bag and took a hesitant sniff inside. Mmm...smelled really bready. Hope the ducks will appreciate it! He fastened the tie back around top and was about to place the loaf back on his lap when Cailia made her appearance.

    Something suddenly grabbed him from aside, causing him to jerk in alarm and the bread to prompt fall out of his hands and to the ground. The hands pulled him back towards what was likely a gaping maw of teeth and saliva and terror! "NYAGH!" His head attempted to retreat into his jacket and he shut his eyes tightly. Just make it quick!

    Cailia wrote:"Adult ducks are hideous."
    He was released and Kev opened his eyes tentatively, he had been joined on the bench now by none other than Cailia. Those eyes, that distinctive hair, there was no denying. "Cailia! I think you gave me a heart attack!" He grabbed at the area to the left and at the bottom of his rib cage, feeling his heart pump frantically, though it was beginning to edge off. "I thought you were gonna kill me! Phew! But yeah, its pretty cold out!" He wrapped his scarf around himself a bit tightly, looking back to her curiously. "Yeah, you're the first to arrive. He'll be along soon though, I'm sure." He soon wiggled his brows at her. "And it will be I, proving you wrong~"

    Kev was grabbing the loaf again when Crowley arrived. "Yeah, its really cold out! Though you don't seem cold..." Unlike Cailia and himself who were dressed for warmth, Crowley was wearing his usual clothes. "Ducks usually hang around near ponds, so if we can find a pond here in the park we'll be all set to prove each other wrong~!"


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    Re: Don't Break Its Back

    Post by Cailia Hallow on Fri Dec 06, 2013 10:40 pm

    What a completely expected and delicious reaction. Kev did make a really good impersonation of a turtle though, his neck completely disappeared when it retreated, he ought go as one for next Halloween. Settled next to him as comfortably as you could be on a cold park bench she began to gave a loudly laugh about him having a heart attack. "If I did, I doubt you'd still be talking about it, Kev~" No, if one had occurred, she would probably be finding a place to hide the body.

    Leaning back and crossing a leg over the other she quieted down and snorted as his second thought might have be accurate in a far different time. "No Kev, I literally have nothing to gain in killing you. I can't prove you wrong if you are dead. See how it works?" Dead men told no tales, but they didn't listen to them either. She nodded in agreement, and wondered if ducks were even around in the cold, it seemed something awful to swimming in pond full of ice cold water. "Winter must not be far off, oh joy." Didn't mind winter so much, except when it snowed because it was ten times harder to walk anywhere without fall flat out on your ass in public. Embarrassing and hard as hell to play off. "I hope so, I want to prove you wrong and go get something warm for lunch." Maybe soup, or whatever was good fo the cold. Like alcohol.

    Cailia looked over her shoulder at the devil that had just been talked of, ironic enough. Looking same as always, no coat which made her wonder if he had some secret to staying warm to which she'd be keen on knowing. "Chilly is a light word for it, kind of like its spring time and not near winter." She remarked before rolling her eyes at Kev's knowledge of where Ducks lingered. "Ducks, near a pond? Inconceivable, they obviously waddle out in the desert." Swimming in the sand, and baking deliciously in the heat. Well, that just intensified the desire to go eat now. She rose from the bench and motioned to Kev. "Come on Kev, let's go find the those sinfully ugly ducks." So she could further prove you wrong.
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    Re: Don't Break Its Back

    Post by Crowley on Sun Dec 08, 2013 8:43 pm

    He could have sworn he'd explained the warmth thing to them before, but eh. No time like the present if they'd both forgotten, or he was thinking of someone else. Not that he talked to many other people. Standing by the bench, he listened to the banter about ducks and was only really peripherally there. He had no stake in the argument after all, he was just there for moral support and as a witness of sorts, though they would both probably claim to not need a witness to the trouncing they were about to give the other.

    "Remember the conversation we had where I explained that I'm only human on the outside?" Let that sit in for an explanation for now, there were more important duck-related quests to go about at present. "Lead on Kev, you're the least likely to broadcast predator vibes to the ducks. Wouldn't want them fleeing before we've had our way with them." It was really really hard to not make innuendos in this company, so sometimes he didn't even try. His hands came out of his pockets to gesture in the direction Cailia seemed to want to go, because he assumed they both knew where they were going. He hadn't the faintest idea, really.
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    Re: Don't Break Its Back

    Post by Kev on Tue Dec 10, 2013 2:12 am

    He'd already gone as a turtle for last year's Halloween! An Adolescent Radioactive Karate Tortoise to be precise, and it had been quite the hit! It was better received than his Tally costume in any case. He gave her an even stare when she laughed at his declaration of a heart attack. "Hey, it takes the brain a while to die right? Maybe these are my dying thoughts!" What lovely last words.

    Nothing to gain by killing him? That was reassuring! "Good, because that would just make a lot of trouble. Besides, I'd rather stay alive a wee bit more!" Yes, winter was nipping at their heels. It was so close, so very close. Winter wasn't exactly his favorite time of year either, for obvious reasons. "Ooh, like maybe soup or something?" Fresh, warm soup did a lot towards warming the body. So too did hot cocoa, and tea! "And Cailia, honey, you need a bit of help with those delusions in your head~!" He tapped her temple playfully. "You are the one being proven wrong here, and I will show you~! Show you the power of DUCKS!"

    Kev turned to Crowley and considered his explanation. Oh yeah! He was....something. Actually, Crowley was very confusing for him to grasp. Mostly he just went with the flow and nodded his head, so if Crowley said he was only human on the outside, he would nod his head. Nod nod nod, what even are you Crowley. Human outside demon inside. He turned back to Cailia and gave her a look at her lovely contribution. "Yeah, well...shut up!" Harumph! He crossed his arms, before finally standing up to start leading them around. "Good plan Crowley! I'll try to be as un-predator-y as I can!" He walked ahead and walked down a small trail in the park, looking high and low. It didn't take long to find a little pond. "Keep an eye out for any ducks~!"

    "Quack quack..."

    That sounded like a duck! Kev looked around before pointing to a tree, where a female duck and her babies were nestled up for warmth.

    "Peep peep peep!"

    "Aaw~! Aren't they just adorable!" The ducks didn't seem to appreciate the attention, as the female started to bob her head in place and make louder noises. Drawn to the noise was a male, who came over a-bobbing his head the whole way. "Here, we can gain their trust by feeding them!" He handed Cailia and Crowley some pieces of bread before pulling the bread apart into tiny pieces and tossing it to the ducks, who gobbled it up tentatively.


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    Re: Don't Break Its Back

    Post by Cailia Hallow on Fri Dec 13, 2013 1:04 am

    Cailia rolled her eyes, finding Kev's drama at perhaps being dead already and his body managing to function perfectly normal while his brain slowly shut down was impossible and inane. "Your dying thoughts are nothing to sneeze at then." They were the best dying thoughts of an apparently already dead man. She gave his hatted head a firm, reassuring pat, making doubly sure to attempt to push it down over his eyes in the process. Again her eyes rolled in response to Kev, his desire to stay alive was strong, which was a good thing but also increasingly obvious. "Well good for you, you get to live another cold, miserable day. Yaaaaay." The first and only time the word yay would escape her lips.

    Making a face, she leaned away from Kev with a disgruntled huff, squinting at the alien after the light tap delivered unto her temple. Time to clear the table with a few rules but first the thought of soup prevailed. "Mmmmh, yes..." Cailia agreed with a sigh before returning to the previous rather than rules a set of retorts. "Not delusional, if I was, I would probably find this all much more exciting. But sadly we aren't going to have duck for lunch with you having your way." The only power duck had was to be very delicious when baked, roasted or other wise cooked and no other ways.

    Kev making a foll out of himself aside, Cailia closed an eye and looked to the sky, trying to recall if that particular conversation had come about. She felt like it had, remember a few segments of the entire thing but those little tidbits did circle back to inhuman = not freezing. Lucky him, though he could at least pretend to feel the cold by wearing a winter coat. If only to make Kev and herself not seem like enormous weenies. Speaking of Kev, she simply looked at him because what else could be said? Ah, wait she knew. "Oh my, how scathing and brilliant a comeback that was. Truly, you are not five years old." She did give a very obvious and amused snort at the mouth-less alien having less predatory vibes to which she would only eagerly say 'of course'. He lacked many traits of a predator and the main one was in fact a mouth. Mouth-less things with huge eyes just seem very threatening, just slightly weird. Now it was time to glance to Crowley and try to keep a grin from cropping up. "Seems like you came here with a different motive in mind, didn't you~?" Cailia teased, find the innuendos a welcome and sadly temporary distraction from the riveting duck hunt they were on.

    Walking after Kev has in fact been fruitful after the tell tale quacking led hem to fluffy yellow ducklings and a completely ugly parent duck. Cailia stared for a moment, then watched as another duck approached in turn with the quacking racket the one with the babies had made. And this one certainly didn't look any better. She accepted the bread, still staring at the ducks. "Kev, these ducks are fucking ugly. Look at the eyes, it looks like they caught something and never got better." It was slightly disconcerting, she really just did not like these ducks, it was like a Turkey, Chicken and a Duck had managed to make some awful love child from the murkiest depths. One thing Cailia also was more than fine with not receiving was the trust of ducks, well not these ducks. Tearing off some of the bread subtly, she ground it to small pieces before tossing the bits surreptitiously towards Kev's calves whenever he turned back to the ducks. Finished with the small task, Cailia stood there and started to smile expectantly and hopefully that these ducks would get the clue.
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    Re: Don't Break Its Back

    Post by Crowley on Fri Dec 13, 2013 11:51 pm

    Why were they talking about death? Seemed excessively morbid for the time of day but then again, looking at Cailia's expression, that might actually be the reason. Coupled with the duck thing, but too bad for her. This was going to be plenty fun, either way. And as such, following the other two did lead to a pond, in which were some of the most bizarre looking ducks Crowley had ever seen. Yes, he'd seen pictures of their ilk before, but seriously? A turkey, crossed with a normal duck wouldn't look quite that bad. On the other hand, it made him think of fire even more, since they looked like their faces had blistered from excessive exposure to heat or something.

    "Of course I had a different motive! You didn't expect me to come out here to vote against one of you, did you?" Honest question, and he didn't particularly want to side with either, having thought about it. A grumpy Cailia was a grumpy problem, and disagreeing with Kev was like kicking a puppy; not that that was a bad thing, but this puppy had powerful friends that were out of the reach of most puppies with the notable exception of Dog.

    Taking the bread from Kev, he began to toy with it idly, eyes glinting with plans as yet unmade as he watched the alien feed them cheerfully while Cailia dust his legs in a less than subtle hint to certain avian company. Deciding for the moment to play the piper, he broke off small chunks of the bread and warmed them with a few sparks, softening it for the birds. If one of them happened to choke on it later as it swelled up in its stomach, that was later and would not be able to distress the currently happy Kev. What he didn't know wouldn't hurt him, while it might kill others in this case.
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    Re: Don't Break Its Back

    Post by Kev on Tue Dec 17, 2013 3:11 am

    His eyesight had been briefly impeded by his own hat, having been shoved down over his eyes by Cailia. He made a small noise of irritation and pushed the hat back up, correcting it. "Yes, I'd say such a thing is good." Seriously, what type of world did Cailia live in where getting to live another day was bad? He preferred not to dwell, for there were ducks to feed! Speaking of ducks... "Yes, there will be no killing the duckies on this field trip. Or else." He gave them a very threatening glare indeed, so terrifying. Cailia then found his comeback to be quite brilliant and wonderful, so good. Much scathing. Very insult. "Yeah, I'm 54, not 5." And lo the subject did turn, to the fair Crowley. Yeah, why had he come? He didn't seem much like the type to just feed ducks for the heck of it. Especially since he didn't want to vote against either Cailia or himself! "So what motive is it?" He asked curiously, quite intrigued.

    It did not take long to find those ducks, and while he fed them he turned to observe Cailia and Crowley. Would Cailia admit defeat? Apparently not. "Ugly?! They're not ugly!" He redirected his attention to the ducks, who gobbled up the bread bits greedily now. "Just because they look a little different doesn't make them ugly. Look at their pretty black and white feathers! And their smooth little bills!" He held a hand out and gave one duckling head a soft stroke when neither parent was looking. The mother duck was busy gobbling Crowley's warmed bread bits, tail wagging behind her eagerly. There was a hack every now and again as a piece or two was a little hard to swallow, but for the most part she hogged those bits. The father duck was checking Cailia out to make sure she was kosher, moving his head up and down, hissing.

    Kev was busy cooing over the duckling, not noticing Cailia's bread tricks. Some bread bounced off his pants and landed to the ground while other bits sat comfortably in the folds of his clothes. He crouched to better see the duckling and pet its head, crumbs still settled in the folds. The other ducklings went for the tiny bits and began to eat them up. One duckling raised its head to investigate one of the crumbs that had fallen on Kev's pants before deciding to eat it. The bill grabbed the crumb, but also pinched part of Kev's calf in the process. "EEEP!" He jolted up and rubbed the spot, looking at Cailia and Crowley incredulously. "That duckling got fresh with me!"


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    Re: Don't Break Its Back

    Post by Cailia Hallow on Thu Dec 19, 2013 11:53 pm

    Sarcasm was apparently lost on Kev, causing her to pinch the bridge of her nose to fight the urge to push the hat back down over Kev's eyes in retaliation. "Of course you would Kev, most rationale beings would too." Funny thing, most people back home were absolutely in love with the idea of staying alive day after day. So Cailia wasn't form a backwards rock that thought life was obsolete. She held her hands up, staving off the implication that she or Crowley were going to be having duck for lunch. "Whatever you say there Captain Commander, just don't those panties of yours twisted up." And that glare was about a 1/10, and the 1 was for effort. It didn't go unnoticed on her that Kev was older than her by a long shot, a now super common fact, but remembering that the real old man here was the shade wearing demon was something to snicker about.

    "Honestly Crowley, I thought you were just waiting around to see if one of us tried to cause harm to the other. Or step in and stop the wrong party-Kev, from being chucked into the pond." Obviously, he wasn't coming to feed ducks for the sake of feeding bread hungry mongrels their fill.It was probably just the irresistible pull of this odd trio thing that was starting to form. Frowning for a moment she recalled that Kev was already in a trio once before and it ended going to complete shit. No, nope, focus and concentration, people's business was just that; theirs. Sneering down at the adults, Cailia shook her head and placed a free hand on her hip. "They are ugly. Also noticed you excluded the eyes or the things around them, hm? Can't pick and choose the cute parts, Kev. They are ugly." He had has much chance as swaying her opinion as that hissing duck had in not getting kicked across the park.

    Watching her work unravel however as one of the ducklings took the bait and tried to gobble up a little bit of Kev was actually far more amusing then she would have thought. "Oh those damn ugly getting fresh ducks, what assholes, right?" Cailia snickered, tearing off a hefty sum of bread, giving the father duck a stink-eye before chucking the piece right at it's head. "Can we go now? Obviously these ducks are ugly and foul tempered." Not much else to prove otherwise, so she turned to Crowley, brows raised in question. "What do you think, Crowley? Aren't they ugly?" No passive road on this little trip.
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    Re: Don't Break Its Back

    Post by Crowley on Sat Dec 21, 2013 12:49 am

    Well shit. Kev -who was, remember, taller than Crowley- gave a glare to match his vague threat about the safety of the ducks to the two of them before returning to happiness mode and somewhat spoiling that threatening aura by going off about how pretty they were. At least his attempted murder wouldn't be noticed until much later, if at all, so he was safe from that threat however serious. Cailia had a good point about him playing the peacekeeper, though it had not escaped his notice that he was the weakest thing in the park besides the ducks by a large margin and he was nothing if not too smart to get between them. That became a moot point shortly, but not before Cailia's efforts came to fruition and a duckling made a pitiful attempt at devouring Kev's leg, or at least that's how he reacted. To the eye it appeared to be a much smaller incident than that.

    "Yes Kev, it did get fresh with you, though probably not because it can understand what you are saying. Though if that is the reason why, that opens up a whole new realm of possibilities." And there was Cailia, making his attempt at not ticking someone off a failure while it was still in its infancy. "I think their faces are certainly ugly. The rest of them doesn't seem that bad." First attempt to dodge the question, launched. She wouldn't let it go at that, knowing her, but perhaps he could draw Kev into the crossfire and deflect most of her attention back at him until she let it go. He did not have much hope, but not trying was much worse than trying.
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    Re: Don't Break Its Back

    Post by Kev on Mon Dec 23, 2013 4:57 am

    Kev gave Cailia quite the curious look at her response about his panties. "Briefs actually, and they're not twisted up at all! Are they?" He turned his head downwards and observed his pants, to see if there were bunched up areas sticking out obscenely. Everything looked to be in order! He didn't usually wear anything beneath his pants like this, winter being an exception so as to keep himself warm. Although his glare seemed not to faze Cailia, Crowley at least seemed to consider the glare something to be wary of, seeing how he didn't make a joke about panties.

    Cailia put forth the idea that Crowley's motive was to be some sort of peacekeeper. Seems legit! They may need one really soon though as neither one wanted to back down on their respective viewpoints. "I'd say the bill is near the red parts. The red parts are even on the bill! And they do have nice eyes, so sweet! Especially the daddy, he has pretty brownish yellow ones! The red parts look sorta swollen, yeah, but they're like the gobbly dangly part on a turkey. Plus they feel soft!" Though the ducks didn't like to be touched there.

    One nip later and Kev was rubbing the sore area of his leg, looking down at the offending duckling with much displeasure. "That's a bad Fignacio. You only get two more pieces of bread." He dropped the bits to the duckling who horked it down before the others could get it. "They're not ugly, Cailia!" He looked to Crowley, considering his words. Yeah, the ducks probably couldn't understand what they were saying. "Yeah, maybe he was just hungry! Poor hungry Fignacio..." Maybe he should give him more bread?

    Crowley's opinion was asked, and he thought the faces were ugly, but the rest was fine. "I think that counts as him agreeing with me~!" He gave Cailia a triumphant look. Cailia suddenly chucked some bread at the father duck's head, the duck letting out a very loud hiss. In response, the mother rounded up the babies and they disappeared in a flash. "Cailia! Why'd you do that?! You made them go away!" All of them except for the father duck, who instantly flew up in Cailia's face. Hissing like a snake, he pecked at her as best as he could. "Down, down Mr. Duck!"

    ---
    COIN - If HIT, father duck scratches/pecks Cailia. If MISS, harmless flapping in her face.


    Last edited by Kev on Mon Dec 23, 2013 4:58 am; edited 1 time in total


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    Re: Don't Break Its Back

    Post by System on Mon Dec 23, 2013 4:57 am

    The member 'Kev' has done the following action : Dice Rolls

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    Re: Don't Break Its Back

    Post by Cailia Hallow on Thu Jan 02, 2014 1:28 pm

    Did he really have to debate over what kind of underwear he wore? She only had said panties as that was common phrase she heard along with various others. One such involving knotted knickers. Which would be used later, eventually. Quietly snorting as the mouth-less alien gave himself a once over, Cailia snickered but she gave Crowley a glance as he actually took Kev's glare...seriously? Ha! Well that was a tiny boost to her mood, easing the feeling of pointlessness that Duck Spotting had offered.

    "Near is like close, which only counts in games of chance and war. And Thank You for dodging that, Crowley. You really must be here for peace keeping after all." She was onto you, and definitely going to shoot down any attempts to stay moderately neutral. 'Kev, you must be going fuddy from all those animals you take care of. Their eyes look as cold and soulless as MaDOS's did." Soulless, full of evil and creepy in the wrong lighting. Of course Kev would think the best of a duck who had bitten the shit out of him, much to her chagrin. Not exactly as planned but Cailia had all the time to mess around both Kev and Crowley alike. "Hungry for living flesh instead of stale bread. They might be hungry for Kev today." A little lean for weight gain but to a tiny duck, he was a walking buffet of food, right?

    Cailia laughed, dropping the rest of her bread as the father hissed and the others vacated on the spot. "Haaa! HAAAA! Oh god, these animals are so fucking stu- AAUGH!" And karma proved once more that being a complete asshole for no reason turns out badly in the end. Her arms rose to shoo away the duck, the regret of not bringing something sharp to gut the quacking menace with. Seeing this was a good chance to cause bodily harm to the creatures that had her out in freezing weather, the hybrid let loose one blind punch hoping to either hit Kev or the damned duck, either was fine at this point.

    ---
    HIT - Kev gets his clock cleaned
    MISS - Lets have duck for lunch

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