Portal Breach: The Collision of Worlds :: v.4.0


    The Home of Our Dreams

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    Zurg
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    Re: The Home of Our Dreams

    Post by Zurg on Sat Jul 30, 2011 7:30 am

    Auuuuuuugh, Jo! That's just awful! *rolls you into another unmarked grave, away from mine*

    "It was probably Red." Zurg had pegged that tail on the ass fairly well. Red's buttocks was huge, you know. Big, red baboon butt was what it was. If Kev had been told not to say anything along with Jo, then a kingpin had to be keeping everyone mum. "Definitely Red. Mustang had told Kev, and if Mustang knew then Red must have been notified. Just how dumb do these people think I am?" They were insulting his intelligence!

    But at least the people staring weren't insulting. Zurg would probably stare, too. Purple doesn't really go with beige -- oh Cosmos, Jo's skin was beige. Cannot unsee! "Normal, sure, but would you harbour psychopathic desires of utterly strangling your friend for doing that?" To emphasize his point he even reached out with a strong hand and literally crushed the air in a vice grip. Take that, Chuck Norris. At being called a nimrod, however, the alien frowned and proudly huffed. He even stuck his non-existent nose into the air with eyes closed. "Hmph! If I'm a nimrod, then you're a nincompoop." There was the segment 'poop' in this word. It amused him greatly.

    But suddenly, surprise sneak attack. Jo just thought it cute to kiss him all over and the alien flailed about. "AJghaghahghaa!" Ewwww, she did that on purpose! Scowling, but jokingly, he rolled up a sleeve to expose a patch of muscle and blubber. Then, with a finger, he did something silly. "Circle circle, dot dot. Now I have my cootie shot. There, now I won't DIE from your girl cooties. You have to be vaccinated for those, you know. What, you want to kill me? GOSH." But... that wasn't to say he didn't enjoy the kisses. He rather liked them, and possibly maybe with other things. Now, however, he was being a grown man warding off Jo's evil girl cooties. The ninny.

    Once Jo said she spotted the house -- how could she tell? -- he stopped fooling around and looked ahead. "I don't see anything. So many TREES." Meant his allergies would kick up with the wind and spring. Nnngh! Ode to weeping eyes and stuffy nasal cavities! "Okay, let's see this monstrosity you picked out yet again, Jo." Arm around her waist and smile upon his face, Zurg was all set to blast off the inner critic and claim all bathtubs.

    All of them.

    (I can't make sense anymore so off to bed I go! See you, Jo!)


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    Re: The Home of Our Dreams

    Post by Jo Pistonne on Sat Jul 30, 2011 11:25 am

    "Oh." Jo hadn't thought that Red would be the one behind keeping everything hush-hush, but it made sense. Hadn't it been Red who'd tried to tell her about Xenon months and months ago? "Maybe he didn't want to worry you unecessarily. Maybe he went to find her on his own to sort things out before going to you?" She did take the moment to wonder what kind of affect it would have on their relationship. Weren't they best friends? Jo didn't know Red very well, but he didn't seem like the type to do something without a good reason.

    "I'd sure have times I felt like kicking them in the bruuka!" But she knew her fleeting emotions of anger were nothing compared to what Zurg was trying to convey. It wasn't that the mechanic forgot Zurg was a complicated man, or didn't see it, but it was an unspoken kind of thing. Poor nimrod indeed. "Oh, relax, Big Z. Forget about her for now. Here, I'll give you some kisses."

    And she did just that (as elaborated in the previous post) and to see his reaction to it just made her laugh like a madwoman, remembering schoolyard days and how boys avoiding playing spin-the-bottle like the plague. "Dr. Pistonne thinks you'll live to yet see another day," was the verdict she gave, with a funny accent and nose-wriggling to boot. Now who did that remind you of?

    The trees did block most things from view, but the mechanic expertly led the hypochondriac alien past the trees and around the corner. As if it was a hard feat when you followed the sidewalk. They did have to step on the lawn for a moment when a few skateboarding boys whizzed past, but they righted themselves and were soon in front of the last house on Jo's list.

    It was a respectable blue house, with a front porch and an overgrown front yawn. Now that was the first front lawn Jo saw that had been allowed to grow in such a wild way and she liked it. The only problem was... it looked like there were three entrances! Which one was the right one? Jo began to rifle through the manila folder again, but she'd misplaced the plans. "Blast it... which door is the front door?!"


    (( Good night! I dozed off again. It's becoming a bad habit. At least I have a latter shift today! ))
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    Re: The Home of Our Dreams

    Post by Zurg on Sat Jul 30, 2011 3:05 pm

    AnimuuuUUUUUU!

    Zurg just made a face, one between freaked out and disgruntled. "That man is just scary... Him and his butter mints." That, and how the twig-like therapist was always keen to root out every single issue about you with blunt force. There was no such thing as subtlety in that alien's office.

    Hey, he was kinda like Jo, come to think of it...

    After stopping his pretend gagging, the Serviceman snorted about the Red situation. "I'll deal with him when the time comes. Same with Xenon. I'll handle them both together and get it allllll out of the way. I don't want to bother with it for more than a day. Don't have the patience or the willpower for that sort of drama anymore." Zurg could have gone on and on about how irritated and annoyed he was, but you know what? He was going to enjoy the rest of his day with Jo and snoop around this house with her. That's what he was going to do. Yes, sir.

    And speaking of houses... BEHOLD! The blue house that Zurg had nearly walked past! Now, let's take a good look at this thing, shall we?

    It was blue. Okay, not such a bad colour. Blue went into making purple, so that's a good start. There was an unruly mess of a front yard and Zurg felt a sarcastic just roll on out of his mouth. "Well, at least you don't have to take care of the yard, Jo. I think the jungle can take care of itself." Ehehe, he even giggled into the palm of his hand like the usual menace he was. What else? Ah, the windows. Again with the many windows. At least they weren't too wide and most seemed to be upstairs. He could live with that, he supposed. And also several doors. If Jo thought she was lost then so was he! "Oh, sure. Ask the alien about the house because, as we know, all aliens know how human houses are." For all he knew the doors could lead to prizes behind each one! You know, like on those game shows?

    Scratching underneath his hardhat, the Serviceman walked up the steps and into the porch, glancing at the left door then right. "I'm going to go with my common sense and saaaaaaaaay... this one." He pointed to the door on the right, the one facing the street, and he jostled the doorknob momentarily. He didn't open the door however, and instead left that up to Jo. "Open the door, open the door, open the door, open the door."

    Guess what he wanted her to do? Open the blasted door, that's right! And he was going to keep repeating the phrase until she did so.

    What a pill.

    (Look at you, dozing off. Perhaps you should set an alarm on your desktop/laptop? I use one sometimes.)


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    Re: The Home of Our Dreams

    Post by Jo Pistonne on Sat Jul 30, 2011 4:28 pm

    Jo had never gone to see Dr. Animus and sincerely hoped she'd never have to. He'd only seen him once, maybe, she didn't exactly remember, but his face and toothbrush-shapes mustache were vaguely familiar. "Butter minds sound like a good solution for the common cold," she laughed.

    And good! At least he'd deal with it all at once to get it over and done with. Dragging things on never did anyone much good, especially the people involved. And in this case, Jo was tempted to say Zurg was the one who'd been hurt most of all; she didn't know where this Xenon had been or why whatever had happened hadn't been her fault, but Zurg hadn't deserved any of it. She patted his arm one last time before looking down at her folder.

    These doors...

    "I bet I could lose Homo in there," she joked. That cat did have a habit for disappearing into the oddest of hiding spots sometimes. And if she didn't ask Zurg, who'd she ask, the wind? Maybe the wind had a better inklign than him. But, following his instincts, Zurg climbed up the steps tp the poch, looking from one door to the next until he decided on one at random. And like a child, he demanded it to be opened.

    Jo snorted and rolled her eyes. "Pushing a door's such a chore, isn't it, Big Z? Your muscles are so small that Jo the Strong has to come and push for you!" And Jo the Strong did push, and what a mighty push it was! The door swing forwards on its hinges and even smacked the wall!

    "...Oops."

    But they were inside now, so Jo ignored whatever Zurg said and walked inside, giving the plans one brief look before surveying her surroundings. There was no actual front hall, but the door led to what appeared to be the living room, and to the right were the dining room and kitchen, connected to each other. Further along, at the end of the living room, were a bathroom and another room, and to the left were stairs that led down to a basement! Finally, a house that had an actual basement!

    Once Zurg had checked out the rooms and tried out the tub, she'd ask him if they could go downstairs. She wanted to see just how much space she'd have for her personal workshop. Finally, a basement and no silly garages~!


    (( I don't think my rickety old laptop can even do that. DX ))
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    Re: The Home of Our Dreams

    Post by Zurg on Sat Jul 30, 2011 4:47 pm

    Jo didn't understand. Zurg just loved Dr. Animus' butter mints and because he did, he avoided the place like the dickens. It was all a very clever ruse, you see, on the doctor's part. Lure his patients in for repeat sessions using the power of sweet, melt-in-your-mouth butter mints! Oh, it was so clever Zurg had even thought of weaving the ploy into one of his schemes now and then. Maybe one day, one day...

    As for these doors? Jo could gripe and roll her eyes all she wanted; he was too busy lightly pushing her repeatedly to walk forward. "Go, go, go, go, go, go." Antsy-pants is right. Just get in the house, scope it out, and let him roll over everything! And of course who could resist commenting on how Jo nearly broke the door in the first place? "Easy there, Jo the Strong. I think you've slayed the Doormanu, the Foul." See why he wore gravitonic bracers? Huh, huh? They came in handy and were also stylish fashion accessories. Bling, bling, baby. No, he wasn't about to deflect bullets like Wonder Woman could with them.

    Now inside, the alien was left to his own devices and he promptly went about. First he inspected the living room, walking around its length in a giant square and then he went into the dining room, the kitchen, a closet, first bedroom, and then... the bathroom. Which he quickly turned on all the water to see if cold water could become hot and vice versa before he turned them right off. Good. Water system worked. Oh, and don't forget he rolled in the bathtub once and hopped out to continue with his inspections. "Water and sewage lines work." Zurg confirmed, trying out all the electrical outlets and doohickeys. "Electricity is in order, too. I wonder if the A/C system is operational." He wasn't looking forward to making another air conditioner, you know.

    In his browsing Zurg had almost overlooked the basement if he hadn't noticed Jo getting excited about something. "What? What is it? Did you find cockroaches?" Oh, if only.

    (You need a new computer, woman!)


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    Re: The Home of Our Dreams

    Post by Jo Pistonne on Sat Jul 30, 2011 5:23 pm

    Oh, so butter mints were like the forbidden tasties of candyland? That made so much sense now. Zurg had to have an immensely strong willpower to be able to resist such temptation. Ohohoho~

    "Alright, alright, keep your skirt on!" Sheesh, someone was a real impatient moozle today, wasn't he? But after hr antics with the door, all she could do was give him this great big, innocent smile, toothy grin and all, before shrugging helplessly. "Accidents happen?" she offered.

    Zurg had this odd habit of walking around rooms when they were large, then inspecting every nook and cranny of a new environment. Jo actually found it very endearing and had the urge to sneak up on him and jump on his back to surprise him, but decided not to give him any heart attacks today.

    "I don't know about the A/C. Does it have a remote?" She looked around but couldn't find one, then wondered if it wasn't included in the house unless you bought it. If that was the case, it'd be kind of unfair. What if they needed to repair the A/C?


    But her attention had, of course, been snagged by the revelation that there was a basement, and she was eager to check it out. "These stairs lead down to the basement!" she said eagerly, pointing down the stairs before flicking on the light switch. A dim light lit up somewhere below them. "Come on, I want to check out how big it is!"

    She went down the steps, and they creaked a bit as she passed. No, she was not fat! She was just a little... rounder around the edges, that's all! There weren't a lot of steps to take until they reached the basement floor, at least. Jo jumped down the last few, then straightened, looking around eagerly.

    The entire basement was one large room, with only one light bulb dangling from a cable to provide light. The floor was rough and cold, and the walls were simple brick. It wasn't as smooth or as matching as the rest of the house so far, but for Jo's needs... it suited her perfectly.

    "This!" she exclaimed, going from one corner to the other in giddy abandon. Maybe she'd have to add a few more lights, but the shape, the size, it was all the way she'd imagined it. "This would make a perfect workshop, Big Z!"

    She was so excited she could kiss him. But best to wait for his reaction first!


    (( I do! Saving up for one and helping the family's hard, though. DX ))
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    Re: The Home of Our Dreams

    Post by Zurg on Sat Jul 30, 2011 5:33 pm

    In case you hadn't noticed, Jo, Zurg was all willpower. Why do you think he rolled magic-types on galactic MMOs? All willpower. At the mechanic's big toothy grin he just shook his head disapprovingly. "There will be no accidents on my watch. Protection is the second-best preventative method~!" Okay, so he was yanking her chain but it was darned funny to pull her leg. Or chicken wing. He really liked chicken wings with loads of salt. Most likely the A/C was installed in the back, outside of the house, and yet to be turned on via a thermostat embedded in one of the halls. That's how these homes normally went.

    Oh, a basement? Well, looked like got her wish! Let's check it out.

    ......Or, not.

    The moment Zurg step foot, watching his steps on the less-than-up-to-code wooden planks, he immediately grew quiet. While Jo was excited, you know what he did. "Oh, I know what this is." Here came the smart mouth remark that was gonna land him in hot water. Screw it! His skin will just peel off and renew itself in a few months! This was worth the trouble. "With some rusty tools over on a few tables, some dangling chains for atmosphere, nefarious torture devices, a bed with thick straps, and a video camera... I think you've just found yourself a genuine, 100% quality rapist's cellar! Mhm! Yep, I think you did." Zurg took one more look at the place and went: "Nope. Nah-uh. No way, Jose. If you're going to keep this, I ain't coming down here. This place is creepy, and I get bad juju vibes. Yeah, I'll be upstairs where it's normal."

    To seal the deal he threw a pinch of salt into the air above them and went right back up the stairs.

    "Rapist's cellar...!" A voice from upstairs echoed.

    (I hear you. Try needing a new computer, going to school, AND helping out family. There's just not enough ways to stretch a dollar these days!)


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    Re: The Home of Our Dreams

    Post by Jo Pistonne on Sat Jul 30, 2011 5:53 pm

    "So a big, strong guy like you is going to protect a poor, innocent girl like me?" Jo smirked, her lips upturning into a smile. It felt more like there was supposed to be some role reversal here or something...

    Jo didn't pay much attention to Zurg's antics at first, still exploring the basement, ready to burst with joy. That is, until he said the key word that made her body go rigid and turn around to fix him with a glare worthy enough of even his scowls.. That wasn't a nice joke! And wait, how did he know how rapist cellars were supposed to look like...?

    "You know what, I don't think I want to know how you came to that conclusion." Must be something sick, perverted minds got down to. Great minds think alike, eh?

    She climbed back up the stairs, still a little huffy. He'd ruined her inner fantasy of having a workshop now! Ugh, curse him! She'd get over it soon enough, but for now it was stuck in her head. But wait, she could use this to her advantage.

    "So, we're in a kinky mood now, are we?" She walked straight up to him, hands on hips. "My, my, Big Z, I never thought you had it in you to want to dabble in such heinous tortures~" She let her fingers walk up his chest, lingering a bit before she grabbed his tie and tugged him down to her level. "Care to test some of them? Perhaps before I fashion the basement into a workshop I can restore it to its supposed original glory~"

    She let him think about it for a second before she grinned and laughed, shaking her head. "A rapist's cellar. Really. Out of all the things you could have called it! Now you had to go and ruin my excitement. All through the renovations, if I do pick this house, I'll be thinking about creepy rapists creeping up on me from the shadows." And watch it only be him trying to give her something to eat and Jo dealing him a blow to his nuts. Yaouch.


    (( The economy's failing fast. It's ridiculous at times... ))
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    Re: The Home of Our Dreams

    Post by Zurg on Sat Jul 30, 2011 6:09 pm

    Pfffft. Now Zurg had to roll his eyes at her remark. "If anyone is innocent here, it's me. You're totally not innocent, Jo. I'm sorry, but being under uniform requires me to be truthful~! A blessing and a curse." Cue the mock sigh. Enjoying himself other than the creepy cellar, he was about to check the air conditioner when Jo came clomping on up. Oh, guess she was miffed he told the truth. Whatever happened to brutally honest? He had been brutal and he had been honest. "I know about these things beeeeeecause..." He stalled and tapped his index fingers together. How to say this and not sound like a creeper himself? "...because I proliferated in multiple evil circles and know these things. Also, I watch the news. Scary, the news. Always negative."

    And, hang on a minute! "Whoa, whoa, whoa! Time out." Zurg held up his hands and made the universal 'T' symbol with them. "I know you have this thing about hormonal urges and can't utterly resist a handsome devil like myself, but Jo! Rape is not kink -- HRRRRGH! NOTTHETIE!" He wheezed, eyes starting to water. Cutting off circulation! Blood pressure rising! GASP. Thankfully the mechanic showed him some lingering remnant of mercy and he rubbed his throat, fixing his poor tie with an indignant pout. "And you can do whatever you want to the basement. If you get this house, I am not -- let me repeat that for you -- ehn oh tee, NOT stepping into that cellar. I don't care if you fill it with shrimp, salt, and Star Command's latest top secret schematics. If you're making home videos, I'm just going to be in the kitchen, with my "dress", and avoiding any incriminating felonies. I'm sorry to ruin your erotic, twisted fantasies, Jo, but if there is one thing I do not fool around with it's crimes of sexual nature. Ooh, bad. Just even talking about this gives me the heebee-jeebies. OOH, I SHUDDER!" Zurg suddenly shouted, shivering like a leaf. Just imaging a black suit with glasses asking him to step out and have a seat in their tinted car was... frightening. Hello, Agents K and J!

    Good fun put aside, he made the sound of smacking lips and looked around. "Well, now that you enjoy your cellar~!" Just look at him sounding sweet and batting his eyes. "We should look upstairs, where there are no creepy rapist creepers creeping~! And if there are, I'm probably going to scream like a little girl~!"


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    Re: The Home of Our Dreams

    Post by Jo Pistonne on Sat Jul 30, 2011 6:20 pm

    ...Wait just a second, just what was that on using protection? Oho! Looked Like Big Z sure did his homework! "Good! Then we won't need to practice the first that's abstinence, right~?" That ought to get him to skip a heartbeat.

    And he was such a pill. Such an annoying, annoying pill! Blowing this subject up into such gigantic proportions. She'd never -- she didn't -- blast it! She was not turned on by rape. That'd be stupid. She'd be scared to death if it ever came down to something like that. And Zurg, though he didn't like dealing in the more flesh-based part of the evil business, had more experience in the subject than she did. Which was a little freaky.

    Although she did find him pretending to be choking from the tie pretty funny.

    "More space for myself then!" she decided with a large smile as she patted his arm. "Don't worry, Big Z, I won't let the big, scary nonexistent rapist get you. Now let's check the top floor and hope we don't find any~"

    Rapists indeed.
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    Re: The Home of Our Dreams

    Post by Zurg on Sat Jul 30, 2011 6:26 pm

    A little slow on the draw, there, Jo. Zurg just gave her this stern, flat look very much like Sam the Eagle. "You should always practice abstinence as it is the number one method of preventing STDs and unwanted pregnancies." Okay, Dad. MOVING ON FROM FATHER ZURG. And who was she calling a little girl!? Well, she didn't actually say it but it was implied! The alien huffed so heavily he sounded like a locomotive and the Serviceman was already off for the stairs. "Shows what you know, Jo! In fact, I think I hear that non-existent rapist calling my name! You can stay here and I'll be the brave one. Hmph!" Off he went, his feet thudding against the house like thunder. To think he didn't have steel-toed boots, either.

    There was some rummaging upstairs, the floorboards creaking from someone's weight, and then suddenly --

    "AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHH!"

    Only one person could pull off a girlish squeal like that. Better go save your little girl, Jo.


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    Re: The Home of Our Dreams

    Post by Jo Pistonne on Sat Jul 30, 2011 6:35 pm

    Jo snorted and rolled her eyes. "Big Z, we're aliens to each other. We can't get STDs from each other and I certainly can't get pregnant by you." She narrowed her eyes at him suddenly, as if she had just thought of something. "Unless you have some sort of weird alien way that will. Are you even like a typical guy down there or what?"

    And Jo said all this with the best poker face ever. You ought to be proud, Big Z.

    But he stomped up the stairs to prove he was a big boy, and the mechanic only sighed and rolled her eyes and let him, starting to climb up the stairs slowly. Until she heard him scream like he'd suddenly ruptured something. Knowing Zurg, he was probably just being a big baby at something, but what if he'd actually gotten hurt.

    Darn him!

    Jo ran up the stairs quickly, looking around for him once she reached the top of the stairs. Now where'd he gone off to?


    (( Short post is short! Break's over and it's time for more work. Yuck! ))
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    Re: The Home of Our Dreams

    Post by Zurg on Sat Jul 30, 2011 7:11 pm

    Oh, now that was a potential proton missile waiting to blast off into Star Command's refuse hatch and blow it up. Read: sexual innuendo. Zurg just scoffed loudly and crossed his arms at Jo's first comment. "Well, gee, Jo. I think after taking forty years of biology I think I know how genetics work. OF COURSE WE CAN'T TRANSMIT STDS TO ONE ANOTHER OR NATURALLY HAVE CHILDREN! My DNA is completely different from yours on the basis that you -- " He pressed a finger into her nose, lightly. " -- evolved from primates and that I, evolved from sea-faring cetaceans. I don't think we need to try and make a monkey/whale child. That's just cruel and insulting evolution." A bit sad in this regards, but evolution had spoken! Zurg wasn't tampering with anything.

    Which... led to him just gawking at Jo's second comment. He just gawked at her with this hurt, wounded sound and pressed a hand upon his chest. "I beg your pardon!" Zurg scoffed once again, his face contorting into a scowl. "You don't see me talking about your genitals, do you? Such like a human!" He went so far as to wag a finger before her eyes with a hand upon his hip while leaning forward -- imagine a scolding mother. "That's what you humans do, isn't it!? You see an alien and then you all make elaborate, outlandish stabs at our private parts! Don't deny it, it's true. As a victim of such similar remarks I feel I am entitled to vent." A mock sniff of pain later and Zurg was working up a good-sized rant. "Oh, sure! His body may look the same, but his head is certainly strange so he's got to look funny downstairs! I bet he's got tentacles, or claws, or teeth! Oh, yes, what about asexual budding or spores? Maybe even nothing at all! What if he impregnates you with his tongue, causing your abdomen to expand and your guts to explode out to make way for parasitic offspring! Yes, because he's an alien!"

    Okay, now he was just being flamboyant instead of angry, but you know Zurg. Drama, drama, drama. And here came the best part. Zurg turned around and held a finger up proudly.

    "For your information, Jo, I am neither of those things! As a sapient organism, I am going to tell you right now, my dear Jo, that I am proudly on the normal genital scale. That means, for your human imagination, I am not too much different from a human male! I... think." Here Zurg paused to give it some thought, and he looked a little hopeless. "Although, to be honest, I haven't researched human genitals in years. Maybe I am a little different... This startles me..."

    Resisting the deepest urge to unbuckle his belt and peek, he simultaneously realized... that Jo was still next to him. And... she had heard everything. Oh, how embarrassing.

    "Bleeeeergh, why am I even telling you this!?" He practically shrieked, slapping his hands upon his hardhat out of frustration. They even produced a hollowed sound. Plonk! "We're not even bonded and I'm telling you this highly-sensitive, private talk about... about privates! I need to go upstairs before something happens." Yes, like Jo asking if she could see and help him out. He wasn't born yesterday, Jo. If you wanted your alien kick go look up the Megamind fandom!

    TO THE FUTURE WHERE HE WAS SCREAMING.

    Meanwhile, in the future...

    Zurg was screaming, what else was new? Oh, probably the circumstance of his screaming.

    "AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHoutstanding!" He happily cried out, slinking further into... sigh... the bathtub upstairs. Oh, Jo was going to murder him. That was putting it lightly. But let him enjoy his last moment of bliss before you do! He was currently rolling around and seeing if he could fit in all directions. YES! He could! It was like watching Free Willy trying out his new tank!

    These whale comments were just so insensitive.

    (See you later, Jo!)


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    Re: The Home of Our Dreams

    Post by Jo Pistonne on Sun Jul 31, 2011 2:43 am

    "Suuuure, Dr. Z, which is my point exactly! No harm, no foul. We can pretty much do anything without protection 'cause or bodies are already protected! In a way... you get me?" Probably not, and maybe his eyes would start bulging in that maddening way of his that she found so amusing. And no, she wouldn't want to wish any child the misfortune of having their combined DNA. Genetics just didn't work that way. Kind of sad, really.

    And there he went being all melodramatic. Yeah, it was a stereotype to wonder whether aliens were different or not, but you never know! Jo wouldn't mind either way, but it wasn't like she'd considered it much -- besides the past few days. Darn cycle. She just wanted to grab him and give him a great big kiss to get him to shut up, but he was on a roll and Jo didn't want to ruin his fun. But ohohoho, not too different from human males? "Good! That means all our bits and pieces fit together like a cog on a machine~!"

    And yes, she was going to offer to take a look to let him know if he was like a human male or not, hah! But the way he said that, about bonded... it made Jo think for a second. Just a second. But she brushed it aside and just grinned after him. "But Big Z! I haven't told you about my privates yet! Don't you want me to debunk some myths?" That'll get him for sure!

    And when he screamed, Jo wondered whether it was because of her last remark, aha! But she figured she ought to go and check anyway, because the big, purple pansy had a way of giving her minor heart attacks at times. So when she looked around and spotted him rolling around in the tub, all she could do was grip the doorframe and sigh. At least he was amusing himself with the master bedroom's bathroom. Say... this was a nice bathroom. And that was a petty big tub...

    "Move over, Big Z! I wanna check this out too!" Sh sat on the tub's edge, then slid in, but of course the big ninny didn't want to move so she wound up falling atop him, limbs all tangled. She giggled and tried to right herself. "This tub looks like it was made for giants! Funny... we both fit in here. Hmm."

    And on this pensive note we'll leave this post to give poor Big Z a chance to react~
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    Re: The Home of Our Dreams

    Post by Zurg on Sun Jul 31, 2011 3:13 am

    Do anything...? If Jo wanted to have him trip on the stairs, he did. Practically skipped a step and skittered over the rest like a floundering spider wearing tap dancing shoes. Rckckekk! Sounded like he was bringing down the whole house from where he was, and Zurg almost ate the rug good. Cog! Machine! Oh, he never! Humans were just gutter-brained people! Still, it did make him wonder... No, No! Keep it cool, keep it cool. He was above such thinking, even though he did start to wonder at times... "I don't need any myths debunked! I'm not interested!" He tried to shout over his shoulder before ultimately rolling into the tub.

    Ohhhhh, now he can just... relax and feel comfortable. Or not, actually.

    Figures he would then see a Jo-shaped shadow drape over him before Jo, herself, tried to fit into the tub. Hey! "Wait your turn, little lady! This tub isn't big enough for the two of -- UUURGH!" Aaaaand then she fell on him, compressing the air out of his chest. Needless to say, the bathtub accommodated them well and Zurg looked around before his hardhat finally slid over his eyes from the sudden jostling. Thunk! "I stand corrected. Apparently it's big enough for the both of us." With a hand he tried to move the stubborn piece of equipment away before Jo starting moving. "Ow! Watch it! No armour, remember?" He winced. Her elbows were sharp! But she eventually settled down and he sighed, laying back against the tub's... whatever it was. The word escaped him.

    He instead worried not about the grammar mashed into his brain and focused on relaxing. Jo may not have figured it out, but he always felt safe in a bathtub. Not for it being a bathtub, but for it having walls all around. He felt nice and barricaded, enclosed. His comfort zone, you could say, and here Jo was... grinning down at him like some great, bit dope. A beautiful dope, actually. He never realized how her eyes glistened in the sunlight. Something like... a smoky quartz. He wasn't very good with gems or precious stones -- so no reason in them. And she smelled very nice. Like... oil, sweat, and machinery. Oh, and some bits and pieces of cheap food. Ah, but all of that were just mere details. Details, details, details. The most alluring thing about her at the moment was how... lukewarm she was. To another human she would be hot, but since his body temperature was hotter she felt slightly cooler. And her heart... he would have thought she was about to explode with how fast it was beating! Well, to his understanding. For a human, again, it was natural.

    All these details... how minute they were and yet how loudly they spoke out to him. He... he wanted to do something, but what? He couldn't just say something to her in his native tongue and expect her to understand, or do some gesture that only he would know! And he was too clumsy to think of a human gesture. Burping and farting was hardly appropriate. So, he did what he thought would work best given the situation. He reached up with a careful hand, and... touched her face. Unlike a human's hand his touch was refined, tuned. It was made to single out every bit of stimuli and individually categorize them. From cupping his hand against her cheek and rubbing it softly with a thumb he could tell things about Jo. For one, her sweat was mixed with the dirt of work. Her pores were clogged and her skin was choked. There was no sign of make-up or foundation, and there wasn't the soft residue of soap or lotion. She was a hard-working woman, but she should really stop to take care of herself... It wouldn't hurt.

    Wait, what was he...

    Abruptly he took his hand away and Zurg heated up a degree or two. "Oh, er! Ah... I'm sorry." He sighed, looking down. "That must have been really awkward. I keep forgetting we're on break. I was never good with personal hints, you know."

    So much for willpower.


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